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  • H_3000
      H3000 @H_3000

    The best things in life are free..ied. Fried. They're fried.

    • 29
    • FAVS
    AmiraKFGhazalelkhodaryJaidaeneincathykuceykasiajazeel______dankepanunitedwolfftriscendent
    • 104
    • RETWEETS
    farahmamduhMariiamSharkawyLeilaHisham1RawaneldeghedyHannaKshawkishaden_MohameddyoungwildhoranNadeenAyoubb
  • H_3000
      H3000 @H_3000

    My life is so pathetic it actually only loaned me lemons.

    • 26
    • FAVS
    AchmdMustafaNou__A_Mgdee__________sab3a_up______DeensterzSMolwickgoreysgirl________spotswoj
    • 51
    • RETWEETS
    Nou__MonsieurM3yergisab3a_up______DeensterzNappySol__________CindyNajm________emmys10LGhetany
  • H_3000
      H3000 @H_3000

    I wish there was a song out there that could speak to how much like a plastic bag I feel right now.

    • 14
    • FAVS
    z3lookahirrohernanfalcon_showameliahenkeljoeljeffreySMolwickcarlythrasherdafuckingmiller
    • 61
    • RETWEETS
    Livyahhhh___ameliahenkelsammiebrennan_SMolwickStavGoesNomRawan_KhalifacarlythrasherTinaShahaltough
  • H_3000
      H3000 @H_3000

    "Ask about our group discounts!" #funeralhomeslogans

    • 23
    • FAVS
    joeljeffreySpiderogerPAT_E_ROCKMeerkatMannersKillerdolceTXLexi____________vxlkMothpete
    • 51
    • RETWEETS
    mayonnaiseheadSMolwickTiatheTigertheerkjLON_DONBridgeskashiichaninvyspiritTan_Loc
  • H_3000
      H3000 @H_3000

    I knew you were trouble when you walked in with that AK-47.

    • 14
    • FAVS
    farahgeninahJaidaeneinkrisbaudouintehejkcasey_frazierrChabreahSon3Palabraschelseajirons
    • 49
    • RETWEETS
    farahgeninahJaidaeneinFloraOuiliTWEETY_TREATSasheeluuAnthitudesee_savageecak_t
  • H_3000
      H3000 @H_3000

    Kim and Kanye's baby is going to look really weird carrying around a big ass and a big head.

    • 11
    • FAVS
    favstar_popPhuongyNguyenpatgoesblackharfassasvpnovahjoannaromero_xorphlgelleganiAriesFenty
    • 52
    • RETWEETS
    dandanatyyDesyannsavenessaquadrosmooshinebrunoAimee_LouiseeethatglifeBuu_Mngadiuhmoy_
  • H_3000
      H3000 @H_3000

    When someone sends me a :-) instead of a regular :) I just assume that person is in love with me.

    • 20
    • FAVS
    sameblackshoes1__joeljeffreySpiderogerKillerdolceTXLexi____________MothpetejosephthomasOpenlyAwesome__
    • 33
    • RETWEETS
    _xoleilataylorblaiseeCarlayCampbelljoeljeffreySwagItOutBieberKeeshbombShiinabugZOMG_ItsFemur
  • H_3000
      H3000 @H_3000

    #blamethemuslims is trending but so is SPONGEBOB LIKES SWAG KING so we shouldn't really be concerned with Twitter's opinion.

    • 7
    • FAVS
    joeljeffreyvxlkSpiderogerMarcusTheTokenSMolwickLeggaliciousOpenlyAwesome__
    • 43
    • RETWEETS
    the_imaniaclaylitafSMolwickrustysnackhusna_01SavedByIzabellbekndignumFatimaZahraKhan__
  • H_3000
      H3000 @H_3000

    Oh you love Jesus? Name three of his albums.

    • 22
    • FAVS
    AriesFentyroobaaltafmsrybadddhalpyyyorianacrosalescvmerxnnAllyGehrrrxoJessica15xo
    • 26
    • RETWEETS
    PlutoNashhiSnitched4OreosAllyGehrrrSanjaAliccsdmehokOlaTKhalilGotCouth_tecasse
  • H_3000
      H3000 @H_3000

    Sometimes when I squint my eyes and pout my lips I look like a model.

    • 13
    • FAVS
    SpiderogerKillerdolceTXLexi____________MothpeteBambamVictoria____OpenlyAwesome__NitraReneeFleetastic
    • 34
    • RETWEETS
    passionless_pithahutchadaobi_93Scarla_xAuRevoirSalopefootykrazed__xohaleyreneenicolechammas
  • H_3000
      H3000 @H_3000

    I didn't do anything useful today so I'd say I'm keeping up with the Kardashians pretty well.

    • 14
    • FAVS
    Spiderogerelisa212007ReemKKhatibSMolwickBambamVictoria____gavhuntmackleselanniikaxx
    • 31
    • RETWEETS
    samygarrimbabonasjrothers________StooTearimonteezySMolwickpopthezakparadisel0st_diaryofatristan
  • H_3000
      H3000 @H_3000

    It's so funny when how people call me arrogant, they actually mean gorgeous.

    • 15
    • FAVS
    Livyahhhh___Spiderogersoonerick76ChiefKimberlyTessaStylinsonherecomesneversaraburzyyourgirlmegi
    • 30
    • RETWEETS
    herecomesneverLeytonSummersSpiderogerbonasjrothers________DarianCadevEATaRiceannamaria294Tasnov
  • H_3000
      H3000 @H_3000

    Call me old-fashioned but I still own slaves.

    • 6
    • FAVS
    SMolwickYoleneReyesllsebbenYassElmasryOpenlyAwesome__ramisalame
    • 38
    • RETWEETS
    SMolwickDevonChrismanMobeanAdamsderekmontesSmeezewitmeGraceJCloustonOhItsMelanie____twistytiger
  • H_3000
      H3000 @H_3000

    Some people take Twitter way too seriously. RT if you agree and also if you love God.

    • 4
    • FAVS
    SpiderogerHyperchickAishamattgonemaddlastnightdreams
    • 40
    • RETWEETS
    3waashaHyperchickAishabykyeMiri8796jojobaeekdizzle04thugnastykellsvtiredgrl
  • H_3000
      H3000 @H_3000

    I knew it was only a matter of time before Rihanna and I had the same haircut.

    • 11
    • FAVS
    anisax33Raffaelloo_______LameesAbazaLittleNuisance____ramisalamesophiekaldensydneyschelviskemy69
    • 32
    • RETWEETS
    TouchMyGlitter___danniikanaomiDougEWattsOrthodoxDrewsDsj77_AyyZedddLinaJaberhairinarmpits
  • H_3000
      H3000 @H_3000

    I'm addicted to painkillers.There, I sedate.

    • 22
    • FAVS
    AhlamelbannaStoenoexxprettymuchBumbleDee__NoorShammamy_jaanxxxmartenmantelvxlk
    • 20
    • RETWEETS
    missmumbiUncle_Dope_wanza_lauielauiefara7ologyghadeerelrefaeyLovelyNsReeN______zainah27
  • H_3000
      H3000 @H_3000

    I think I've unwillingly heard Adele's voice more often than my mother's.

    • 6
    • FAVS
    hosio_dgphotos__________arsi90BumbleDee__viewfromyeyes__AliceRostikova__
    • 36
    • RETWEETS
    hosio_sharaeBEARalternateharryLeeLoves1D__FarahkhaledHf0reverunbrokenpunkbelinaMelissaLBrindle__
  • H_3000
      H3000 @H_3000

    I can create an uncomfortable silence in three languages.

    • 9
    • FAVS
    alyaimanparachutebaby__fiercedrew________fryersmuckramisalameKasperSoetersmartenmantelduong_tiffany
    • 30
    • RETWEETS
    LoisBlueRoseMookaPookaWhatSmellsGoodStooTeagraphikDesignrsophiekaldenamira339puddingtoes
  • H_3000
      H3000 @H_3000

    Lindsay Lohan died so Emma Stone could live.

    • 14
    • FAVS
    BambamVictoriaderkaberk___shimshima__haleymccolganmeghkellbree_robinsonlaurespinosaBrittneyLea
    • 24
    • RETWEETS
    byeseecallRicGleeksjannahrizkcarl72rphlgelleganiMe_YoU_MuSiCForeverRoxy1CaireeCBeliebs
  • H_3000
      H3000 @H_3000

    A warm toilet seat is my favourite kind of disgusting.

    • 7
    • FAVS
    DanTheSnick__SpiderogerOpenlyAwesome__angelica378247__4everyoung10Te4se__krystalcopley
    • 31
    • RETWEETS
    Spiderogerse4sickAstronautKelson__SovySweetnessitz_noorBrahim_SanGarlic_NutsMichelleLGlover
@H_3000

@H_3000

You can relax around me.