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A sense of humor is deliciously sexy.
Who do I speak to about quitting adulthood?
Men just stop trying to figure us out. You're wasting precious time. Go have a beer.
I'm very stressed out, I really need to cum
My answer to the checkout guy when he asked "How are you today?"
Oh, you like me? I give it a week.
Nothing is sexier than a man who aims to please his woman.
Ladies, there's nothing wrong with having a filthy mind. Own that.
You look like you would ruin my life. Let's fuck.
I'm just curious, do you fuck as good as you tweet?
I don't trust people who say they don't masturbate.
Your secrets are safe with me because I zone out everytime you speak.
You know what's sexy?
A man who respects women.
I want to be the reason you smile every time you check your phone.
Panties: Because his fingers sliding them to the side is my favorite moment.
Let's skip all the romance and fuck me against the wall.
If I'm biting my bottom lip while you're speaking to me, I'm doing naughty things to you in my mind.
Great minds fuck alike.
I constantly get asked: Why do you RT women a lot?
My answer: Because the women here are funny & most importantly I'm not a jealous cunt.
Music makes me feel
Most importantly music makes me feel fuckin' alive.
I don't subtweet. I'm a fucking adult. I'll ask my friend to DM you and ask if you like me or not.