My neighbor just witnessed me trying to kick a crow in its face in case you were wondering if I had any dignity left.

Bought a bag of chocolates a gift to someone and I'm sooo tempted to just dig into it and somehow convince myself I deserve it more.

"I know she's kind of socially retarded and weird, but she's my friend, and I love her." @ashleeeewehage http://t.co/ERq8TIgZ

These three people are the wittiest and smartest and funniest people on Twitter. @garyjanetti @markhoppus & @kpsommer #FF #LoveThem

Don't name your kid Miruya.

@tricia_aguirre She seriously needs to get over herself. I'm so tired of girls who think they're heroes just because they harvest raisins.

Not only a gorgeous but talented actress that I'm grateful to be friends with. @tricia_aguirre #FF

Nothing good ever comes out of me checking my Facebook feed unless good means rolling my eyes and wishing I never knew any of these people.

This bitch is dragging on about upcoming assignments and the girl next to me just told me she was a Republican and now I just want to die.

The stupid barista didn't even chuckle when I ordered my coffee "black, like my soul" so fuck you Missoula, you're fucking lame anyways.

Pretending to be interested in my computer programming class requires more effort than actually being interested, so I just never go.

Me: "What if there was a way to group like, similar songs together? You know?" Cari: "...you mean like a playlist?" Me: "Well........yeah."

Stop lying to yourself and just admit Tom Cruise is fucking HOT. #Crazy #ButHot

No Gossip Girl or Pretty Little Liars or Bachelor?!?!?!? WOWWW #MightAsWellDie

Just saw a Native American man who actually turned out to be a woman up close in case you were all wondering how thrilling Montana could be.

If you haven't seen The Artist, go see it. This is the type of movie I can watch over and over again #WonderfulFilm #AllTheAwards

@maaouad Little Secrets - Chamberlin

Girls from Montana just remind me of Valley girls and now I have a headache. #RollThoseUGGsBackUp #UndoThatPonytail #DitchTheSweatband #GOD

Really talented actress and just one of the all-around nicest people you will ever meet in your life, guaranteed. @tricia_aguirre #FF

If you have loud neighbors, the best thing to do is kill them. Don't be a pussy, just do it.