"Where there's cake, there's hope. And there's always cake."

If there is a choice...I will choose intelligent loneliness over stupid company

When it comes to guys:

Crappy = crappy;
Ok = Ok;
Good = Good;
Great = Great;
Perfect = Gay.

Every fight is a food fight when you’re a cannibal.

I wear a necklace just so I will know when I am upside down

Because of their size, parents may be difficult to discipline properly.

Give a man a fire and you'll heat him up for a few hours. Set a man on fire and you'll heat him up for the rest of his life.

Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.

Going back to sleep. I am too introspective at 6 in the morning.

If you insist on measuring yourself, place the measuring tape around your heart rather than your head.

I live by the theory that I have to be a real bitch once in a while so that others can fully appreciate my lady-like, gentle, loving nature.

I refuse to bend down to your level. But I'm sure the view of my panty is exquisite.

Give a man a fire and you'll heat him up for a few hours. Set a man on fire and you'll heat him up for the rest of his life.

Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime. Teach a woman to do the same and she won't need a man.

Our span of life is brief but is long enough for us to live well and honestly. ~ Cicero

I love people that make me a better version of myself, simply by association. "I like the me I am when I am with you"

One of the best lessons in life is how to pick yourself up. In order to do that, you have to stumble. To be a pro...stumble often.

Career choice. If it's what you fall asleep thinking about and wake up excited about. That's what you should pursue.

There's a fine line between insanity and 500 self-portraits on your cell phone. A very fine line. (And stop making me comment on each one)

Just chased a Hispanic man pushing the ghetto corn cart. Yelling "Vente!! Vente!" Which I think means "come here". He walked faster.