Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
How do you know you don't like bribes if you've never accepted one?
After the strongest coffee any 52kg girl has ever consumed I now feel like I can fly... I'm also pretty sure my heartbeat is audible.
The difference between tortellini and tortelloni is the spelling.
I'm not back on Twitter to brag about failed sobriety tests and my bad ass swag gangster motherf... Wait, what's sobriety?
If only there were some way to attach my boyfriends crotch to the remote control car. The dog can walk itself.