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"If it's not facebook official, I consider you single." girl at table next to me.
And though it says your penis is stupid, it certainly says my vagina is an idiot. - @shannonwoodward
And after a moment, she was gone. After the door closed, I felt like the last man on Earth. #Cashback
There are few joys greater than cold pizza, That 70s Show and avoiding responsibility...
If Ian Kinsler was cool enough to get a movie made about him. James Franco would do a fine job.
RT @ebertchicago: Man has 82 tattoos of Julia Roberts, will continue until he runs out of space. http://t.co/rqAHy2c // Creeeepy...
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