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Fuck you @josecanseco, you creeper. Nobody calls me a butterface. http://t.co/qkkY7uNv
my show on the food network would just be called "watch me ruin things with hot sauce."
Random residents of Newark are currently staying at @corybooker's house - eating, showering, & watching movies. Wrap your head around that.
In 20 yrs, our children will look back at same-sex marriage ban like segregation, shocked & ashamed that we allowed it to go on for so long.
How is Radio Shack still in business? Is there a huge demand for remote control cars that I'm not aware of?
Tweeting this again because it's literally the most ridiculous thing I've ever read and I need you to see it. http://thedailycricket.com/2008/06/23/bizzare-arrest-on-rt-95/ …
Ohhh, @chrissyteigen, I found your spirit animal. Meet Tuna. pic.twitter.com/67MQWoNx
Faux hawk guy is my age & landing shit on Mars. I have to read the directions 3x on a bag of popcorn.
Jesus. Christ. “@gameism: Proud my 8yo girl failed this worksheet. Wish she had failed it even "worse." #GenderBias pic.twitter.com/6zuWiNFk”
Don't worry guys, I'm sure the storm won't hit. If it's a legitimate hurricane, Republican's bodies have ways of shutting those things down.
Boys - not sure what to be Halloween? #Mayhem. You're welcome. http://t.co/Q0nIRpZh
Kind of weird how I never outgrew that thing where I find a new song that I love and then play it 20x in a row until I hate it.
Every time Jennifer Hudson gets Dreamgirls recognition, Beyonce kicks a puppy.
8:30 am - wedding dress, scrunchie, crutches, & smoking a butt. I would give ANYTHING to know this story. pic.twitter.com/EGpMlaXO
@realdonaldtrump easy to say when you don't have to worry about a pre-existing condition or serious illness bankrupting your family.
“Our battered suitcases were piled on the sidewalk again; we had longer ways to go. But no matter, the road is life.” – Kerouac