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Those important seconds when your brain first deciphers if it's going to be Queen or Vanilla Ice that started playing.
I'm a lover of music and music has never betrayed me.
Some tweets you star because that person shared such a moment of vulnerability that your heart is the one hitting the fave button.
This is a passive aggressive tweet.
No, it's totally fine if you don't get it.
For my next trick, watch me make a girl roll her eyes just by sending her a text message.
She's the type that could destroy my heart. I'm the type to find the warmth in hers.
Melt in each other as we play with fire.
Vaginas are a superpower and kryptonite all at once.
My phone is dying, but my life is thriving.
If you were a body of water
I'd dive into you face first.
You're so fucking hot, you're still a hottie in that picture where you look like crap.
I've probably never done anything but care. Haha butt care, it's important people. Squats & stuff. Butt stuff. Ha I'm stupid. Don't care.
A moment of silence for hot avi girl who is boring as all fuck.
That awkward moment when somebody overdoes it with the awkward moment tweets.
DENISE, HOLD MY BALLS DENISE. I MEAN CALLS. YES, I KNOW WE'RE IN THE SAME ROOM. NO, I SAID CALL.. Nm, great job, Denise
Hurry up and get in my life. I want to make you smile lots and lots.
"You're not even that fucking hot, but you're funny as fuck" is too a compliment.
Stay strong through the hard times. You must pass that test so you can adequately help others. It honors everyone who's ever loved you.
Say something non-fairytale and see if she's a woman or a girl.
Wanna share my bud with you and taste you everyday.
Be your taste bud.
She knows it all, but could learn a lot from me. I know almost nothing, but I know I could make her happy.
Departures to stupid shit. Replaced Air Marshall with a DJ. Word has it last night a DJ saved my life. // http://t.co/9jYKYFDcEn
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