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  • Jesatronic
      Jes @Jesatronic

    Don't slip that Freudian at me.

    • 324
    • FAVS
    The_Just_FactorDJLIWIKZlalenguafuertevajjiefbaby1InTheStinkerVonBrutal________DaddyJewMasterOfFury
    • 66
    • RETWEETS
    PJPFLALoms2009silent_musingsbeskrajanmerryjenlvjasonlight73MrRamBillingsgavinpivott
    Veuxssamalmightysamllvvzzz_odlanyeR
  • Jesatronic
      Jes @Jesatronic

    When I retweet you, that's me telling everyone they better fucking follow you.

    • 283
    • FAVS
    EhLibby82The_Just_FactorDJLIWIKZClamDiveMaui_Speaks4shishplainjane9erzolofighter
    • 117
    • RETWEETS
    The_Just_FactorDJLIWIKZmalharivsonume_ShwentoDAwkwardWhaleRezaahna_Kzolofighter
    gavinpivott
  • Jesatronic
      Jes @Jesatronic

    Eventually, I may get bonus features. If there's ever a time when I'm not going to use that $30 toward alcohol or groceries.

    • 213
    • FAVS
    The_Just_FactorlalenguafuertevajjiefbabyVikeeysSecret1InTheStinkerMasterOfFurygrimpossiblemonstabrat________
    • 34
    • RETWEETS
    EternallyE________HuwLaytonMizzKellyBaybiestacibonboncatlikethiefx0____gavinpivottwickedmayfairTheTennisPhenom
    GreenSmoke_
  • Jesatronic
      Jes @Jesatronic

    A hard on is when you just want to fuck, a crush develops when you realise you also want to taste their mind.

    • 206
    • FAVS
    DJLIWIKZCalWarnerakissofwordsvajjiefbabyVikeeysSecret1InTheStinkerMasterOfFurygrimpossible
    • 48
    • RETWEETS
    beskrajanisonepowerRFallen2014SoCoolHollywoodamiercasiraghiSureshMKothariShoutingGoddessSirBenderWill____
    MutedBSartistgavinpivottSupportPets_
  • Jesatronic
      Jes @Jesatronic

    Not asking for much, just someone to kiss and who will play with my hair when I get too excited and will remind me to take my drugs. And sex

    • 200
    • FAVS
    The_Just_FactorClamDiveCalWarnerakissofwordslalenguafuerteBrentweetsbloody_hollyVikeeysSecret
    • 48
    • RETWEETS
    vajjiefbabyKirstyLJ86PJPFLAbmr_bobbyalien_sapienidonttakemymedsthedayofthedotLe_Voyageur_
    wickedmayfair
  • Jesatronic
      Jes @Jesatronic

    Your car certainly won't fucking impress me if your brain doesn't.

    • 190
    • FAVS
    ClamDivevajjiefbabyUghMehUgh________lizaelazizaEmmeryBoredthemorris23TexasChiquitabmwgrl5
    • 51
    • RETWEETS
    misc_laneEmmeryBoredTexasChiquitabmwgrl5RedHairDntCareJ___masala_chaijessica_truongcajunlawchick
    Vodka_A_Jones____goreysgirl________
  • Jesatronic
      Jes @Jesatronic

    Being mature doesn't mean I'm more serious than you, just that I'm able to deal with the bullshit life throws at me.

    • 183
    • FAVS
    81malcolmVikeeysSecret1InTheStinkeraKhalifa101stacibonbonMasterOfFuryomjockegrimpossible
    • 41
    • RETWEETS
    dmd_dxb81malcolmVikeeysSecretblessedlyfe2_MasterOfFuryiBurnL7solita81indonesianidle
  • Jesatronic
      Jes @Jesatronic

    'And the thing about fucking in a Prius is that you don't have to feel guilty afterwards.'
    (But still don't do it.)

    • 169
    • FAVS
    vajjiefbaby1InTheStinkerMasterOfFurygrimpossiblethedayofthedotmonstabrat________llvvzzDontTouchMyWine
    • 18
    • RETWEETS
    Tinkerbell_jasonlight73gavinpivottnerdamageCool_Jesseanshul90Mike_WrongMy_Ego_Altered
    obi7k3nobi________
  • Jesatronic
      Jes @Jesatronic

    Tell someone you love them today, because life is short. But shout it at them in German, cos life is also terrifying and confusing.

    • 167
    • FAVS
    The_Just_FactorDJLIWIKZConstantSprayClamDiveCalWarnerlalenguafuertevajjiefbabyeTHEgoddess
    • 119
    • RETWEETS
    DJLIWIKZClamDivevajjiefbabyDaddyJewMontiacMoxieLauramuddafuggaKirstyLJ86PJPFLA
    Tinkerbell_bulletproofQpid
  • Jesatronic
      Jes @Jesatronic

    I'm just going to roll around naked until I absolutely have to get dressed. Is that okay?

    • 147
    • FAVS
    ClamDivelalenguafuertesilent_musingsVikeeysSecret1InTheStinkergrimpossiblethedayofthedotmonstabrat________
    • 17
    • RETWEETS
    ladyfiredancerMashhPdJulesJuliettafavstar1000favsKingBeelzeBeardjustsomebloke69meat_tornado_fifty_buds
  • Jesatronic
      Jes @Jesatronic

    Everyone should spend at least one year in a major city, one year on drugs, and five years being clinically insane.

    • 137
    • FAVS
    ClamDivevajjiefbaby1InTheStinkeraKhalifa101MasterOfFurygrimpossiblethedayofthedotmonstabrat________
    • 41
    • RETWEETS
    ClamDivecarmilla_k__SirPrincessmichael3girlsorphananni1978mama_dealer______PlankSePisangfavstar1000favs
    LoveThoseValium
  • Jesatronic
      Jes @Jesatronic

    I joke about sex but I don't joke about rape. You probably shouldn't either because it sucks. Thanks.

    • 123
    • FAVS
    vajjiefbabyprimandearlessfastingcannibalVikeeysSecretgrimpossiblethedayofthedotmonstabrat________llvvzz
    • 35
    • RETWEETS
    VikeeysSecretKellyB214________arascojeMatthewLay2_amandatweets____catlikethiefx0____kamzilifiQ__SirPrincess
  • Jesatronic
      Jes @Jesatronic

    I'm just going to start doodling trophies and uploading them and @'ing them to people.

    • 114
    • FAVS
    ClamDivevajjiefbabyMasterOfFurygrimpossiblemonstabrat________llvvzzBettieBloodlustmichelle_angus
    • 10
    • RETWEETS
    favstar1000favsCarmstasticFavstar500FavsMike_WronggavinpivottLe_Voyageur_favstar_popBedouin13
  • Jesatronic
      Jes @Jesatronic

    My phone refuses to accept 'jeggings' as a word, so here's proof they're ridiculous.

    • 104
    • FAVS
    ClamDivelalenguafuertevajjiefbabygrimpossiblethedayofthedotmonstabrat________Inconsteveablellvvzz
    • 9
    • RETWEETS
    ClamDivefavstar1000favs1982hughiecarolinajaseDeborahDLAcatlikethiefx0____Favstar500Favsbuttgrape
  • Jesatronic
      Jes @Jesatronic

    Right, because waving my arms and yelling down the hall in German is the perfect way to reassure you that I am sane.

    • 101
    • FAVS
    roobaedleygrimpossiblethedayofthedotmonstabrat________InconsteveablellvvzzBettieBloodlustShipInTheKnight
    • 11
    • RETWEETS
    favstar1000favsxbert68facciabellacarrot_jewsRamblingMachine__LilRedRidngWoodAristotlesNZ__Favstar500Favs
  • Jesatronic
      Jes @Jesatronic

    I put a lot of effort into going to get drunk.

    • 93
    • FAVS
    ClamDivelalenguafuertevajjiefbabyMasterOfFurygrimpossiblemonstabrat________Inconsteveablellvvzz
    • 19
    • RETWEETS
    Charley_Chalupagavinpivottpreawsaurusmojo_bones_fifty_budselsTheGhostBackOffMyBeer____minkameme
  • Jesatronic
      Jes @Jesatronic

    Questions I don't want to ask:
    'How did that get on my glasses?'

    • 91
    • FAVS
    ClamDivelalenguafuerteprimandearlessMasterOfFuryefasheefaa________grimpossiblehippo_chicProbablyAugust
    • 9
    • RETWEETS
    thedayofthedotnerdamageSamson_BainesEggsSmokesExbouncerface______Favstar500FavsLe_Voyageur_SweetSierra84____
  • Jesatronic
      Jes @Jesatronic

    Favstar hates me.

    • 89
    • FAVS
    primandearlessgrimpossiblethedayofthedotmonstabrat________catlikethiefx0____ShipInTheKnightmichelle_angusLe_Voyageur_
    • 5
    • RETWEETS
    KDsMorningfavstar500_esSattamuniImHopel3ssnerdamage
    nerdamage
  • Jesatronic
      Jes @Jesatronic

    Someone is hovering over me. Hey guy, how do you like my twitter TL?

    • 88
    • FAVS
    MasterOfFurygrimpossiblethedayofthedotmonstabrat________llvvzzSirBenderWill____ShipInTheKnightmichelle_angus
    • 2
    • RETWEETS
    Ah_kee_oh________Cool_Jesse
  • Jesatronic
      Jes @Jesatronic

    If I have mono I will laugh and laugh.*

    *Sleep forever.

    • 81
    • FAVS
    vajjiefbabythedayofthedotmonstabrat________llvvzzShipInTheKnightmichelle_angusThat_Damn_Duckprimandearless
    • 6
    • RETWEETS
    That_Damn_DuckFrankCurtisBFavstar500FavsLe_Voyageur_ladyjazsjunkShoutingGoddess
@Jesatronic

@Jesatronic

Neurotic foodie type with a brain faster than a Bugatti.