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  • Just_Joshing_U
      Joshie @Just_Joshing_U

    Dear dad: Seeing "Sent from my iPad" is making me a jealous person. I'm going to make my signature say, "So much younger than you."

    • 195
    • FAVS
    mydmacArroiaStella1070evaheartsheartsvanvanelliAredubbleyou______laffytakkyLindaInDisguise
    • 20
    • RETWEETS
    laffytakkyblondecalamitydoglover100DeschainGilead____abu_alyoser1HyperchickAishaCe_rendipityfavstar1000favs
  • Just_Joshing_U
      Joshie @Just_Joshing_U

    There's a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so they can't get away.

    • 152
    • FAVS
    mydmacTastyTuneTweetsArroiaStella1070BazarComedylaffytakkyLindaInDisguisepiplips
    • 25
    • RETWEETS
    BazarComedylaffytakkysarita7108mydarkside13_Prozach74________TheIllustriousDkevnastoKeltic_Cowboy____
    thehubrist
  • Just_Joshing_U
      Joshie @Just_Joshing_U

    I've never really grown up, I just learned how to act in public.

    • 138
    • FAVS
    TheNaturalDadpatiencebbmydmacTastyTuneTweetsRuns_WildArroiaStella1070Effingtypical____
    • 31
    • RETWEETS
    TheNaturalDadpatiencebbRuns_WildlaffytakkyYour__Highness_piplipsHalf_A_Jaffa______Abedo0o0
    bourbonmelikey
  • Just_Joshing_U
      Joshie @Just_Joshing_U

    The sole purpose of a child's middle name, is so you can tell when he's really in trouble.

    • 119
    • FAVS
    mydmacTastyTuneTweetsArroiaStella1070Effingtypical____gwatts77laffytakkyLindaInDisguise
    • 25
    • RETWEETS
    TastyTuneTweetsEffingtypical____laffytakkyk8dotcomfavstar1000favsAllisonNazarianpaigevickersLakeOconeeBldr____
  • Just_Joshing_U
      Joshie @Just_Joshing_U

    Airport security apparently needs to learn "good touch" and "bad touch" like we did back in 2nd grade because they are not getting it.

    • 85
    • FAVS
    mydmacTastyTuneTweetsTripleunderhookRuns_WildArroiaStella1070laffytakkyLindaInDisguise
    • 16
    • RETWEETS
    TripleunderhookRuns_WildAglaea_bourbonmelikeykevinrowe1Favstar500FavsMouthyMess________akmamma
  • Just_Joshing_U
      Joshie @Just_Joshing_U

    I don't think I ever want another girlfriend. Especially if the cost of toilet paper goes up.

    • 78
    • FAVS
    mydmacArroiaTheHighCreatorslaffytakkypiplipsMilkshakeAnyone__tiffanycoen1______bourbonmelikey
    • 14
    • RETWEETS
    laffytakkypiplipsbourbonmelikeyajcave76AristotlesNZ__retardedjanitorLaredo8307Favstar500Favs
  • Just_Joshing_U
      Joshie @Just_Joshing_U

    Just test drove a Corvette today. When salesperson approached me about purchasing I told him that I would be back during my midlife crisis.

    • 85
    • FAVS
    mydmacTastyTuneTweetsArroiaStella1070laffytakkypiplipsMilkshakeAnyone__tiffanycoen1______
    • 5
    • RETWEETS
    Favstar500Favspibbles8The_Real_Tao______MouthyMess________JohnnyBCool
  • Just_Joshing_U
      Joshie @Just_Joshing_U

    I want to be the someone you cant live without.

    • 58
    • FAVS
    mydmacArroiaStella1070laffytakkypiplipsMilkshakeAnyone__tiffanycoen1______JennWhetton______
    • 24
    • RETWEETS
    Aglaea_bourbonmelikeyFavstar500FavsVelvetElizabethsweetpprmintteaxkattxhcaraineymarieSoeperman_N
  • Just_Joshing_U
      Joshie @Just_Joshing_U

    Thank you, over-aggressive water faucet, for splashing water all over me and making it look like I peed my pants.

    • 71
    • FAVS
    mydmacArroiaStella1070roxyisradrobrousseaulaffytakkypiplipsMilkshakeAnyone__
    • 9
    • RETWEETS
    laffytakkybourbonmelikeyEggsSmokesExCuddleboobies____Favstar500FavskevnastoAnalAnnieedeborahMc10
  • Just_Joshing_U
      Joshie @Just_Joshing_U

    The only reason men wear a tie is to cover up stains on their shirt. As for bow ties, I have no clue why anyone would wear one of those.

    • 68
    • FAVS
    mydmacArroiaStella1070laffytakkypiplipsMilkshakeAnyone__bourbonmelikeyRamblingMachine__
    • 5
    • RETWEETS
    DeepSigh_________Laredo8307Cuddleboobies____Favstar500Favskevnasto
  • Just_Joshing_U
      Joshie @Just_Joshing_U

    Following people back on Twitter is like a dating game. I'm supposed to wait 3-5 days before I follow back, right?

    • 69
    • FAVS
    mydmacArroiaStella1070laffytakkypiplipstiffanycoen1______bourbonmelikeyRamblingMachine__
    • 3
    • RETWEETS
    Favstar500FavsMuath_tu__________bite_it_harder
  • Just_Joshing_U
      Joshie @Just_Joshing_U

    I'm a wreck and I'm emotionally unstable really wasn't the pick up line I was looking for. At least I'm honest.

    • 64
    • FAVS
    mydmacRuns_WildArroiaStella1070laffytakkypiplipsMilkshakeAnyone__tiffanycoen1______
    • 7
    • RETWEETS
    Stella1070sweetsmacker______Favstar500Favsstephs_muffinssuperkeenoneMouthyMess________KatieTheGrandma__
  • Just_Joshing_U
      Joshie @Just_Joshing_U

    Nothing like beating your neighbor to their Sunday paper.

    • 58
    • FAVS
    mydmacArroiaStella1070laffytakkypiplipsMilkshakeAnyone__bourbonmelikeyRamblingMachine__
    • 4
    • RETWEETS
    Favstar500FavsSquirrelNugsPurldGirlygirlL22
  • Just_Joshing_U
      Joshie @Just_Joshing_U

    I've figured it all out! Women don't say what they want but they reserve the right to be pissed off if they don't get what they want.

    • 48
    • FAVS
    mydmacArroiaStella1070laffytakkypiplipstiffanycoen1______RamblingMachine__Joe__b_
    • 13
    • RETWEETS
    laffytakkytiffanycoen1______MeliMadreTierraAristotlesNZ__RiceBelt66Phiri_Rojax______VoiceOfReason25Megan_Dills
  • Just_Joshing_U
      Joshie @Just_Joshing_U

    Chaz Bono is that guy from U2, right?

    • 52
    • FAVS
    mydmacArroiaStella1070nickbachanlaffytakkypiplipsRamblingMachine__chrisblablabla
    • 8
    • RETWEETS
    Favstar500FavsKimleslaffytakkybertknee_perezbrandonmeehan____MizBlueBallsRunForrest12______HoneyBaaBaa
  • Just_Joshing_U
      Joshie @Just_Joshing_U

    Fabulous people are easy to spot because they are few and far between.

    • 52
    • FAVS
    mydmacVirgoSherryRuns_WildArroialaffytakkypiplipsRamblingMachine__brookekaylat
    • 6
    • RETWEETS
    Favstar500FavsCanadianCheriMissItAintMe______MouthyMess________smartypeachKraz60
  • Just_Joshing_U
      Joshie @Just_Joshing_U

    I'm faking my pregrancy for the maternity leave.

    • 53
    • FAVS
    Todd_MaggsMyLoveGoesDown____KanazBadazzStego2012mydmacArroiaStella1070laffytakky
    • 4
    • RETWEETS
    Favstar500FavsmydmacEagle_VisionHey_Yo_Mikey______
    YesThatAmy
  • Just_Joshing_U
      Joshie @Just_Joshing_U

    I just said Happy Valentines Day to a guy in the bathroom. That was awkward.

    • 49
    • FAVS
    mydmacArroiaStella1070laffytakkypiplipsRamblingMachine__YesThatAmyAristotlesNZ__
    • 6
    • RETWEETS
    draaronarcherswollenvoiceZSheHappyN_TritonJRehlingTaraHighman______
  • Just_Joshing_U
      Joshie @Just_Joshing_U

    Is it a bad sign when your girlfriend points out another woman and says she would be perfect for you? Looks like my days are numbered.

    • 52
    • FAVS
    mydmacArroiaStella1070laffytakkypiplipstiffanycoen1______bourbonmelikeyRamblingMachine__
    • 2
    • RETWEETS
    Favstar500FavsHyperchickAisha
  • Just_Joshing_U
      Joshie @Just_Joshing_U

    If you would only listen, you might just realize what you're missing, you're missing me.

    • 43
    • FAVS
    mydmacArroiaStella1070laffytakkypiplipstiffanycoen1______RamblingMachine__YesThatAmy
    • 6
    • RETWEETS
    favstar_popdeborahMc10MoxiePink21KristiGilliganjaagermistressMouthyMess________
@Just_Joshing_U

@Just_Joshing_U

A guy who's just happy to be here. If in doubt, check the twitter handle.