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Ran outside bucknaked, 'cept for a helmet, with Merica wrote on my chest. Headbutted a lawn flamingo and yelled, "Put me in the game coach."
If you get your talkin' phone wet, try leavin' it in dry rice, overnight. The rice attracts "Asians" who fix your electronics. It's science.
A thick honey caught me eyeballin' her. Winked and said, "I'm tryin' to look at your personality, but your boobies are in the way. Merica."
More like "I wish I had a relationship with an emotionally unstable man so I can use him and be the indirect cause of his death"
There's two types of people in this world. Folks who drive a diesel and folks who want to. Roll coal, baby. Merica.
Ran outside and powerslid across the hood of my truck. Busted a flex, slapped my biceps and yelled,"Obamas ain't takin' these guns. Merica."
School and studyin'? Ain't nobody got time for that. Merica.
Woke up covered in bite marks. Accordin' to the WebMDs, either I got nasty with a velociraptor, or some thick honeys thought I was a snack.
Respect your mother. You son of a bitch. Merica.
finna git turnt at digon alley
Rock me mama, any way you feel. Merica.
If there's a better way to seduce a gal than by askin',"From 1 to Merica, how free are you tonight," I ain't found it. Bitches love Romance.
I'm gonna catch some bass, got twenty lures in my pocket. I'm, I'm, I'm fishin', castin' for my dinner. Hook 'em and cook 'em. Merica.
Seen a sissy hit a gal. Busted his skull and said,"This is Merica. We don't hit honeys and talk Spanglish, we hit homers and speak Merican."
Ain't sure why learnin' schools have them fancy finals tests. The only number calculatin' folks need to know is 50 stars + 13 bars = Merica.
Diesel makes her clothes fall off. Merica.
I'll take the Forth of July over Cinco de Mexico all day, every day. And twice on Sundays. Merica.
Went gallopin' outside on my stick horse. Cracked a cold one, threw an air hump and yelled,"Merica, giddyup and get nasty, it's Derby time."