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  • KarmaTie
      Kate @KarmaTie

    Personally, I'd be ecstatic to receive a Dick in a Box this Christmas.

    • 14
    • FAVS
    1kueldadTheTennisPhenomComebackhead______Carter_TCBFadeAway2TheDailySchmucknoway741Gwinifer
    • 2
    • RETWEETS
    noway741FrauDammt
  • KarmaTie
      Kate @KarmaTie

    My dog was misbehaving while I was cleaning so I sucked up one of his balls with the vacuum cleaner hose. We had a good laugh.

    • 11
    • FAVS
    WheelTod1kueldadTheTennisPhenomDearStabbyBuzzy_Gran________JimGivitisSquirrelNugsComebackhead______
    • 2
    • RETWEETS
    Comebackhead______nerdsrockk
  • KarmaTie
      Kate @KarmaTie

    I'm sorry what? I can't hear anything over the smell of your armpits.

    • 6
    • FAVS
    WheelTodDearStabbyShineOnDownCabetoMejiaJimGivitisHeyAmie
    • 3
    • RETWEETS
    WheelTodShineOnDownJimGivitis
  • KarmaTie
      Kate @KarmaTie

    I'll put an f at the end of "wreath" if I fucking feel like it.

    • 7
    • FAVS
    Comebackhead______Carter_TCBtpurvis06flsteelersbabeStexcyJayInSanAntonioBeccaRuba
    • 1
    • RETWEET
    JayInSanAntonio
  • KarmaTie
      Kate @KarmaTie

    I use the word "cunt" no less than 30 times a day. Everyday. A girl's gotta have goals.

    • 6
    • FAVS
    Comebackhead______Carter_TCBFadeAway2SilencedVerse____eTHEgoddessIngloriousApe
    • 1
    • RETWEET
    IngloriousApe
  • KarmaTie
      Kate @KarmaTie

    Ambalamps? Ohhh. AMBULANCE. No, I'm not calling one for you.

    • 5
    • FAVS
    DearStabbyOldSadBastardpolyhumorousJimGivitisJayInSanAntonio
    • 2
    • RETWEETS
    FuLingYooJimGivitis
  • KarmaTie
      Kate @KarmaTie

    I'm almost positive that you're allowed to murder anyone who makes 2 wrong number phone calls before 7:30 a.m.

    • 7
    • FAVS
    Comebackhead______Carter_TCBMaui_SpeaksJust_Joshing_USeeEllVeeSpotswoj__________Ms_Peep__________
  • KarmaTie
      Kate @KarmaTie

    Just ate about a pound of chocolate. Bring it on, night terrors.

    • 6
    • FAVS
    splendidly_dullTheTennisPhenomJimGivitisswollenvoiceJeremyInKCpixelpiper
  • KarmaTie
      Kate @KarmaTie

    Fuck you Victoria's Secret sweatpants....I'm not paying $70 for something I get my period in.

    • 6
    • FAVS
    DearStabbyComebackhead______Carter_TCBTheDailySchmuckSarahsJokesCarlTheFourth
  • KarmaTie
      Kate @KarmaTie

    I miss having a boyfriend most on garbage night.

    • 6
    • FAVS
    DearStabbyComebackhead______Carter_TCBNoNotJennyJust_Joshing_Uwickedmayfair
  • KarmaTie
      Kate @KarmaTie

    My shopping basket currently contains duct tape, bleach, Tylenol pm and garbage bags. I feel like I should explain myself to this cashier.

    • 5
    • FAVS
    splendidly_dullJust_Joshing_URykWeston________minority723NefariousOddity__
  • KarmaTie
      Kate @KarmaTie

    I'm gonna make a great stepmom someday.

    • 5
    • FAVS
    DearStabbyCarter_TCBNoNotJennywickedmayfairRykWeston________
  • KarmaTie
      Kate @KarmaTie

    It's not even 10 yet and I've already told someone to suck it.

    • 5
    • FAVS
    Comebackhead______Carter_TCBNoNotJennywickedmayfairsnarkanoid
  • KarmaTie
      Kate @KarmaTie

    I'd rather eat pudding with a knife than do dishes right now

    • 3
    • FAVS
    funnybeachgirlHouston_Basseric10F
    • 1
    • RETWEET
    eric10F
  • KarmaTie
      Kate @KarmaTie

    Old lady upstairs died. Dibs on the readers digests.

    • 4
    • FAVS
    splendidly_dullmaddmimlaneymgsnakep1ss
  • KarmaTie
      Kate @KarmaTie

    Just watched a five year old say "fuck you mom" and then spit on her. Omg I want kids sooo bad you guys.

    • 4
    • FAVS
    splendidly_dullBrandonDePaoloTheTennisPhenomSuSuSuDonym______
  • KarmaTie
      Kate @KarmaTie

    Old people, credit cards and gas pumps are the new axis of evil.

    • 4
    • FAVS
    splendidly_dullthemoviemuffinComebackhead______scenesfromahat
  • KarmaTie
      Kate @KarmaTie

    I hate to use the word epic but there is no other way to explain the cunt-punch I just witnessed.

    • 4
    • FAVS
    JimGivitisCarter_TCBHappySicles______swollenvoice
  • KarmaTie
      Kate @KarmaTie

    Eating chicken nuggets, drinking wine out of the bottle and watching Emmett Otters Jugband xmas. Its what Jesus would want, you guys.

    • 4
    • FAVS
    Comebackhead______Carter_TCBNoNotJennysnarkanoid
  • KarmaTie
      Kate @KarmaTie

    I guess I'm just tired of not having Bradley Cooper here to spoon me while I fall asleep.

    • 3
    • FAVS
    splendidly_dulllaneymgFadeAway2
@KarmaTie

@KarmaTie

Dog groomer by trade, awesome by nature.