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Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity
We could curse the darkness; or we could light a candle.
Tomorrow I'm having a fire sale. If I don't sell something, I get fired!
If you watch Les Miserable while you are miserable, you will have to admit to yourself: You ain't that miserable!
Puppet Susan Rice has been named National Security Adviser; a position that does not require Congressional approval.
Osama is dead! Now can I go through an airport without getting molested?
Dear beautiful Spring weather, I miss you. Was it something I said?
Please be kind to one another. You never know what they are going through. A kind word could be the lifeline they need to get them through.
Facebook might be used to decide if you are qualified for jury duty.. So I'll go ahead and get this out of the way... Hang em High!!!
2014; Bye Felicia!!!
Watching golf in the rain; best nap EVER.
I don't care Disney lied to me about Prince Charming I'm more upset about the unwillingness of forest creatures to clean my house!
When someone texts me; "who is this" I always say; "Jake from State Farm"
Dear NSA, Thank you for listening to me. <3
Futurist, Writer, Strategist, Social Media Guru, Consultant, Entrepreneur, Patriot
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