Like, if his knob touched my ba-donk-a-donk I think I'd bloody loose my kippers and mash, what-hoe. #HeyJasmineamiBritish

My penis has this awesome disco ball that rises out of my urethra it goes unce unce unce unce unce #pleaseendthislie

"Hey dad, know that hardblush comic?" "Where he sucks at video games and then cocks?" "Yeah"

I strap explosives to my Logan shrine and hit the detonator. "Goodnight, sweet prince" I say as I am buried alive in Bad Dragons/Toothless

In Nolan's The Dark Knight Rises there's a scene where Batman eats every cop in Gotham alive

AN ALTERNATE REALITY WHERE @cake_smoth USES LOWER CASE. there are no survivors

Microsoft turns Kami about by her shoulders, pats her on the butt and warns; "Don't spend that all in one place!"

aVATAR TE LAST DATABENDER AHAHAHHAHA

Databendr irl http://t.co/J1Wgwscf

Lookin' good mister Vice President~~~~ http://t.co/iKAW1l0i

aaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Thanks @tarastrong #twilightlicious http://t.co/Yvn8KhXf

GIRLS CONFIRMED TO EXIST

God damn, @ironkami and @scruffyman 4eva

Butts. God I love butts.

Wow Scarlet Johansson, you sure are good at making breathy faces like you just got done sucking a POTTS WHY ARE YOU USING THAT OLD CELL.

@ah_michael Dude it's Christmas Eve and your flight is being delayed. DIE HARD 2 THAT PLACE

Debating writing fan fiction of The Neon Crew in space. @jakefrosh to co-author and concept art, @droppedsalami to give doge advice/research

@rad_adult Shut up you cunt, fuckin' BUTTPLUG MONKEY

It's leviOHsa pic.twitter.com/2M9vXkjH