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Remember kids, if you don't sin, Jesus died for nothing.
I WASN'T MASTURBATING. I WAS CLEANING IT AND IT WENT OFF.
If you think no one cares, miss a few payments
Christ is so cool. He's born, I get presents. He dies, I get candy.
I don't mean to brag, I don't mean to boast, but BITCHES I'M MAKING TOAST!
"fat chicks are fun, just get really drunk and pretend you're swimming" -my roomie, the chubby chaser.
Well I'm going to play with my privates now. These G.I. Joes aren't going to kill themselves.
I'm gonna rock out with my cock out, while you blackout with your rack out and we'll hit up denny's in the morning. #bestline2010
Girlfriend pregnant error, [A]bort, [M]arry, [I]gnore ?
I'd like a chick that doesn't have BitchX pre-installed.
Dear people, I can't help you if the best definition of the problem you can give is "It don't work"
There's something about trampolines that brings out the kid in you. Also boobs.
Wild house party last night. Anyone know whose baby this is?!?
Making korean spare ribs on memorial day, b'cuz 'merica!
Anybody can get a girlfriend, just like anybody can get a job. Most likely you have a "minimum wage" girlfriend.
chmod +wrx /bin/tweets UX nerd, Security Penetration. Expert at Ninjaneering