You're all pregnant shut up

-puts kneepads, elbow-pads and helmet on- I'm ready to do a sex

Every 20 minutes a child is diagnosed with a mustache.

I hope hell is real so we can all burn in it.

Omg that looks so fucking gross RT @peaceofclay890 This recipe is just plain wrong. EWW! pic.twitter.com/YlWKClLqYZ

Fuck all your lives.

I'm having phone sex. -shoves phone up my vagina-

#iRespectFemalesTweets This TT's getting me mad but I'ma pretend I'm blind so I can't see it. R E T W E E T if you've ever been mad.

My gay rap: Pussy so wet, call it Niagra. Dick so limp, pop a Viagra.

I'm really jealous that you're an alcoholic. Like, you're so fucking cool. Oh my god.

Seriously, just spare yourself and don't even open this. http://twitpic.com/5ttpys

Lemme see your boobs. I wanna see your boobs. Lemme see your boobs. I wanna see your boobs. Lemme see your boobs. I wanna see your boobs. Le

I hit puberty today!!1!1!11!!!

Herpin' n derpin'

If you don't laugh at this picture there's something wrong with you. http://t.co/0KEjU1P

Rap like Lil Wayne... GO! -takes a hit- -ugly laugh- -mumbles- Nigga.

I wanna fucking castrate you.

"Hey, let's go to Starbucks." - Pretentious assholes

We're all fucked.

Thanks to @mtv, every teenager in my town is pregnant.