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I heard if you say "Chris Brown" three times in the mirror, he appears. Then he punches you in the face and takes your phone.
This next poem is about black love: Fuck you mean you pregnant? Bitch it ain't mine. Sure I fucked you raw, but I pulled out ev'ry time.
Kim Kardashian is going to force E! to give her a 90 min special now. Most of it is gonna be her at Beyonce concerts trying to get in pics.
Felicia came out w/ all them titties, looking like the dresser from "Beauty & the Beast." Thought she was gon start singing "Be Our Guest."
Roland Martin made a good point (for once). Since Zimmerman pursued Trayvon, Trayvon had the same rights under the "Stand Your Ground" law.
Nicki Minaj makes music for women who go to the club wearing a belly shirt two weeks after their C-section.
Is it true that T-Pain has HIV and his stagename is derived from the pain one feels when his/her T-cell count is low? Or did I make that up?
Birds fell out the sky, a bunch of fish died, then some grasshoppers, now new Zodiac signs. Wrap it up, Earth. God is about to ctrl+alt+del.
Wait... If Keri Hilson is covering a Whitney Houston song... WHO'S COVERING HER SHIFT AT IHOP?!?!?! KERRRRRRRRIIIIIIII! *shakes fist*
Silkk rapped like he broke into the studio and tried to record his ish before P found out, but was having trouble remembering what he wrote.
Satan and Beyonce whisper in Ciara's ear each night "girl, people come to hear you sing, not to see you dance" then go home and laugh.
My grandpa has been burried for almost 17 years. My grandma still wears her wedding ring. THAT'S the shit I want.
Musiq's career hasn't been the same since "Juslisen." When he took his shades off in the "Half Crazy" video, people packed up and went home.
I like to go up to random Indian women and whisper "soon" as I stroke their hair.
This is dedicated to every man who accidentally washed his face w/ his mom's coochie rag once in his youth. You didn't let it break you.
Shirley dressed like the first black professor at Hogwarts.
Kya really didn't care who her online boo turned out to be. Dude could've turned out to be a horse and she still would've been down to meet.
The first candidate to come out and say "Fuck Sallie Mae" may just win by landslide. Ppl got deep beef with that bitch.
Anytime I feel down, I listen to Keyshia Cole's "I Ain't Thru." That opening note reminds me that there are worse things in life.