• Ahoy!

    Please Sign In

    Favstar gets even better if you sign in.

    Here's why signing in is good for you.

    • You get a personalized view of Favstar based on the people you follow.
    • Your likes and retweets are collected instantly, meaning your status and stats get updated at blazing speeds.
    • Use lists to manage your friends, and keep on top of where the fav-love is happening.

    Your account is safe, of course!

    • We never see your twitter password.
    • We won't tweet or follow anyone without your permission.
    • We only use your API calls when you like, retweet, or follow someone.
Okay, you have been unsubscribed.
  • Lisa_Laughs_
      @sshole @Lisa_Laughs_

    Early to bed, early to hit the snooze 27 times and still be late.

    • 709
    • LIKES
    _jennjennSPNNlogicedwardsnathnTDBradley3take2skwAnotherDamnLisakathybotteasCristanBBailey
    • 469
    • RETWEETS
    take2skwkathybotteasCristanBBaileyJeannieG40jabba_jabba_jawTheWWindjunejuly12iAmDelFreaky
    brunopieroni
  • Lisa_Laughs_
      @sshole @Lisa_Laughs_

    I keep incredibly busy for someone that doesn't do anything.

    • 1,149
    • LIKES
    tricyclerunawaymajor_mustache1JonesthePoetTBLFANnFLUsagiNoMegami4Missy_KellTemeculaAmycynicanoldicus
    • 813
    • RETWEETS
    major_mustache1cousins0001YahN_iKristinaWasiuratheshantillylvvzzco_rapunzel4atieyK
    treadmilldnumbmacchiato
  • Lisa_Laughs_
      @sshole @Lisa_Laughs_

    If you take away the blonde hair, prince charming, hopes and dreams, I'm just like Cinderella.

    • 732
    • LIKES
    SPNNlogicli4mst3w4rtAbi_Green83angibangiekathybotteasstanschanuzereprenovitzIngridSpeaks
    • 507
    • RETWEETS
    brittservasxeileeeenxnikklenewanderingfaery1__jentastic15KimMeredizJsalaheddineIAmSaidWhiskey
  • Lisa_Laughs_
      @sshole @Lisa_Laughs_

    Oh, you were born to be wild? That's nice. I was born to be miserable.

    • 742
    • LIKES
    SPNNlogicli4mst3w4rtrandomlady74CubicleViewsddsmidtZwolf666BScleavageannajane83
    • 472
    • RETWEETS
    li4mst3w4rtddsmidtcurlymalloyB_KaralyIAmSaidWhiskeypameliandmndiquotegoonershubham
    DontTouchMyWine
  • Lisa_Laughs_
      @sshole @Lisa_Laughs_

    fortune cookie- You will not die alone but with many many cat...
    cat: LOL THAT'S SO YOU!

    • 424
    • LIKES
    SPNNlogicli4mst3w4rtddsmidtBlackJermsProkraztinatorshaunmwormfredizherejack_slut16
    • 248
    • RETWEETS
    ShanayacakesddsmidtBlackJermsgitson_shigglesSheDoneGoodBillJitsutjcirimeleshmarieb
    MondayPajamas
  • Lisa_Laughs_
      @sshole @Lisa_Laughs_

    You had me at "hello" but you lost me at "I have 5 kids under the age of 10."

    • 941
    • LIKES
    AgentMatzobaldMrniceguy87StevenEveral_babyblue13MsGreenGoddessAdderAllStarMaMikeamoEsyliamK
    • 451
    • RETWEETS
    AgentMatzobaldStevenEveral_babyblue13vlak_offBarry65li4mst3w4rtcranky_unfun_1FuckabillyRex
    Social_Mime
  • Lisa_Laughs_
      @sshole @Lisa_Laughs_

    Hey, I may not look like much right now, but believe me, in the morning I'll look even worse.

    • 748
    • LIKES
    li4mst3w4rtmandadaddarioBigChiefMadigemineyeboynotsosupermom_The_SculptressMBittersweet25BlackJerms
    • 452
    • RETWEETS
    carlylundenlettuce_fetishlovealwayslacyJsalaheddineIAmSaidWhiskeyndiquoteBlackJermspopulamania
    YourDailyGroan
  • Lisa_Laughs_
      @sshole @Lisa_Laughs_

    There's nothing like coming home to where I grew up to make me feel happy I moved away.

    • 564
    • LIKES
    HoldawayIanli4mst3w4rtThe_SculptressMBittersweet25populamaniagitson_shigglesGlassToTh3Arsonrasmithii
    • 315
    • RETWEETS
    HoldawayIanpopulamaniagitson_shigglestjcirimelelovemydogduckmiswordedAliHashem0RdrJay47
    thatguysinghchompy_jr
  • Lisa_Laughs_
      @sshole @Lisa_Laughs_

    Sometimes its nice not to be in the driver's seat, and other times your 16 yo daughter is driving and you're too scared to open your eyes.

    • 472
    • LIKES
    ckvandersteltkathybotteasMBittersweet25GlassToTh3ArsontjcirimelePanettaSexyTimelovemydogduckDaniLynn1024
    • 215
    • RETWEETS
    kathybotteasudaysahadevanlovemydogduckDaniLynn1024TobiasBDogsprgroveshammbone84itsmetrb
  • Lisa_Laughs_
      @sshole @Lisa_Laughs_

    I'd tap that.
    *winks at keg*

    • 1,008
    • LIKES
    HoldawayIanKC_in_LincolnUrthman1MartySauceMBittersweet25CowsaidwhatMatthewACherrymrs_klwr
    • 651
    • RETWEETS
    HoldawayIanPepperSprayingfavstar1000favsEmetiicdiemeticzoe_taylorrrLearn2Fly_66KatieArnWino15
    Spaced_Cowboy00T_Bonezzz__
  • Lisa_Laughs_
      @sshole @Lisa_Laughs_

    Salesman: Can I help you find something?
    Me: This!
    *points to your avi on my phone*

    • 365
    • LIKES
    MBittersweet25rasmithiitjcirimeleJohnnyNopolis__emilymjAnthonyEwartviolet_heartinSuchaDumbWorld
    • 194
    • RETWEETS
    __emilymjviolet_heartintanya_s7spicy_peenHeyoShellzWendydarlingirlonly1_words__maabr78
  • Lisa_Laughs_
      @sshole @Lisa_Laughs_

    I got a new phone and lost all of my drafts.
    Okay, a couple of drafts.
    Fine, 2 words I put in there last year but it was gonna be great.

    • 498
    • LIKES
    The_SculptressMBittersweet25ZoeLightlyDennisKaymerJimmerThatisAllmatlhodi_malopeGlassToTh3Arsontjcirimele
    • 265
    • RETWEETS
    ZoeLightlyJimmerThatisAllGlassToTh3Arsonchi179velma_08Not0nDrugsddsmidtAnthonyEwart
    CulturedRuffian
  • Lisa_Laughs_
      @sshole @Lisa_Laughs_

    If you don't love something, you should also set it free.

    • 1,298
    • LIKES
    mlb_matosHoldawayIanruler_44AngelinaC72TheRealRobGdevilracer8raushank579mitchelle_mrym
    • 872
    • RETWEETS
    HoldawayIanAngelinaC72Squirrel___NutsSPNNlogicB_Karalymitchelle_mrymJsalaheddineIAmSaidWhiskey
    NaomiGlitterJeffSarcastic
  • Lisa_Laughs_
      @sshole @Lisa_Laughs_

    I've been trying to kick a bad habit, but he keeps getting away.

    • 522
    • LIKES
    MBittersweet25Rakiby1DobbyxTheCatvapourintheairHilaryVerversThe_MartiniGirlsheefaaaaaglamerizemeadam
    • 304
    • RETWEETS
    shirazfarahatOrabiSalehThe_MartiniGirl__emilymjAnthonyEwartDriven1updamnjaneBellaRene1369
    Flattliner
  • Lisa_Laughs_
      @sshole @Lisa_Laughs_

    I'm awake but I could easily go back to sleep for 2 or 3 days.

    • 761
    • LIKES
    MBittersweet25metacognizant_Matteroffact80__emilymjAnthonyEwartthecuznedjennjack81pokeybrown1960
    • 528
    • RETWEETS
    __emilymjKG5LVXAnthonyEwartthecuznedzeezah_mdenimlunchboxshiftingpercep1KneeColeSlaw
  • Lisa_Laughs_
      @sshole @Lisa_Laughs_

    I'm pretty much over this whole "being human" thing.

    • 846
    • LIKES
    PinkCamoTOMBittersweet25WeekendWife85theresawil2013Hurricane_TimmyjustchristyyyScottwB42rustygunter
    • 521
    • RETWEETS
    PinkCamoTOgaytrirana53bhagatsingh016Hurricane_TimmyEAlMansyScottwB42rustygunter__emilymj
    darrinfbalex_perez01UnderchildeCelebrityChezCulturedRuffian
  • Lisa_Laughs_
      @sshole @Lisa_Laughs_

    The best part of planning all the stuff you're going to do when you have time off work is not doing any of it.

    • 793
    • LIKES
    rosariobagasUrthman1MELSBMCleftarmismePolygameistJimmerThatisAllDYBLDAnthonyEwart
    • 510
    • RETWEETS
    Jsalaheddinehappy_creaturesR_atrikaPolygameistJimmerThatisAllAnthonyEwartzachm1976EricLeeCountry
    Writethatdown12fsufloresAlex_N_Chains
  • Lisa_Laughs_
      @sshole @Lisa_Laughs_

    Hate is such a strong word.
    *Hate flexes for a selfie*

    • 447
    • LIKES
    T_Bonezzz_MattMcC112ozCourageJimmerThatisAllToxicProbablyAnthonyEwartNicole_Kapp87jeskalala
    • 243
    • RETWEETS
    T_Bonezzz_12ozCourageJimmerThatisAllAnthonyEwartBrandilzz__mattgallo123felicia_levernham_free
    OrigamiUndies__asadkhawaja
  • Lisa_Laughs_
      @sshole @Lisa_Laughs_

    Sometimes I can't even get my own bra unhooked fast enough, so I get it Fumble Fingers, I get it.

    • 464
    • LIKES
    LittleJimmy61White_Trash_TomT_Bonezzz_ToxicProbablynutofhockeyMelvinofYorkheatherhaskidstroyt335
    • 237
    • RETWEETS
    T_Bonezzz_Just4funsaP0tterhead_394__emilymjAnthonyEwartSquishKittenchristy_cappedRdrJay47
    One_FineMess
  • Lisa_Laughs_
      @sshole @Lisa_Laughs_

    Just saw a man spanking his kids, so being the good person I am, I tried to help. Oh stop, I didn't spank them, I just held them down.

    • 909
    • LIKES
    mathtermindT_Bonezzz_mom_needsadrinkDanLtcRHugBoxNinjaDS9SteveDentonReportsTemeculaAmy
    • 499
    • RETWEETS
    T_Bonezzz_mom_needsadrinkChartocTassiaGroverBecketAdamsrcromwell4TheBeerdedOneCosmicBombshell

@sshole’s Newest Tweets

@Lisa_Laughs_

@Lisa_Laughs_ Pro

I wrote a funny tweet once. https://twitter.com/search?q=from%3ALisa_Laughs_&src=typd

Gift 128x128

Like @Lisa_Laughs_’s tweets? Extend their Favstar Pro Membership to show you care.

Extend their Pro!