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Yes ma'am I'll have a double order of bleh with a side of profound deep-fried boredom.
People who don't curse haven't learned how awesome a good "fuck" can feel in your mouth.
My cats are like slasher movie creeps.
I'm in the bathroom & they rattle the doorknob & slide their little paws under the door...O_O
In a very real sense, libraries allowed me to survive my childhood. #LoveLibraries
So who's off this weekend? Got awesome plans? NOT ME! *pouts* *stomps feet*
“@cool_jesse: Remember when we found the Tooth-Fairy's house?”
Yes. It was made of the teeth she stole from tweakers. Tina's a bitch.
Teen just opened my bedroom door, shouted "man boobs! Haha!" and ran away...O.o
"@mo_thecanadian: @literarygrrrl I don't wanna go to worrrkkkkk.....*sob*" I give you permission to stay home!
Dear brain: when I lay in bed, that's your cue to shut the fuck up. #KayThanks
Guy called the #Pharmacy and asked for a refill on his Cialis. He said: "my wife just read Fifty Shades of Grey. Gotta be ready."
Ooo lala!
I tweet too much. I overvalue the word FUCK. And I write: thrillers as me. Smut as @Sasha_Sparks Team B.R.O.A.D.S.
