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I'm literally fucking insane, why do people still fuck with me?
I want a shirt that says "ask me about my tits"
If you want to prove that potheads are intelligent, give them all a bunch of weed, but nothing to smoke out of. Watch what happens.
God, I love black chicks
I just want to fall in love again.
Life as an adult is so weird sometimes.
I have such a soft spot for lesbians. It's called my vagina.
I'm going to start making it a requirement that you have to have good credit to date me.
why doesn’t someone invent a clear toaster so you can see how toasted your toast is while it’s toasting?
Watching the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show naked and eating a greasy bacon cheeseburger and french fries. I'm also planning on anorexia.