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  • Llib_Notwal
      Llib Notwal @Llib_Notwal

    Curb stomped my 2yo in a game of Cootie Bugs today. Just like I'm going to skull fuck this seminar on unnecessarily violent imagery tonight.

    • 150
    • FAVS
    CSPeskymissingblakescruzin_USAtheyearofelanDanKCharnleyCpt_BurnoutVoiceofgarthBambamVictoria
    • 36
    • RETWEETS
    cruzin_USARussellHenders2LeatherStuddedXAlannaColvinacalab2781TomHanksIsHotEl_gr8cornholioSteveTa11
    Cthunicornvladchoc
  • Llib_Notwal
      Llib Notwal @Llib_Notwal

    The best part of lincoln logs is the possibilities. You can build a log cabin or a ... did I say log cabin yet?

    • 128
    • FAVS
    CSPeskymissingblakestheyearofelanchubbbypanda______ElektraLuxxxskinnyphuqerjefftminstonTheNewLives
    • 28
    • RETWEETS
    prot0zoanMcSwtrvstamandasilva28favstar1000favsmeganeggncheeseVicNickDaily______Duane1024juliekgill
    MsCarlissimaOuterJohnWowItsStephen
  • Llib_Notwal
      Llib Notwal @Llib_Notwal

    Has anyone figured out where to put your arms when sleeping yet?

    • 103
    • FAVS
    CSPeskytheyearofelanchasesalsburyDanKCharnleybsharpjchristinawilderLastMermaid__ElektraLuxxx
    • 34
    • RETWEETS
    favstar1000favscucamberraubswhaatkendyl_kerchoWhataWagnerFedaykin451McSwtrvstTexMexicanish____
    amberfw
  • Llib_Notwal
      Llib Notwal @Llib_Notwal

    "Seems silly to throw it in the trash just because its covered in human shit." - Where the Cloth diaper industry and I come to an impasse.

    • 102
    • FAVS
    CSPeskylipgloss_munkeyDanKCharnleyMcSwtrvstCpt_BurnoutFredPollack_correctomundojennalynn518__
    • 25
    • RETWEETS
    favstar1000favsBeigeDynamitejennalynn518__VoiceofgarthJackWHuffhgindhartamandasilva28Disrespexual
    Voiceofgarth
  • Llib_Notwal
      Llib Notwal @Llib_Notwal

    My wife being out of town for two days has taught me how unbelievably amazing I will get at video games if she ever dies.

    • 99
    • FAVS
    CSPeskymissingblakesCpt_BurnoutVoiceofgarthBambamVictoriajennnygeeeAmburglar_Australianimal
    • 16
    • RETWEETS
    SarraBethianmcgintysig357_13CaptainYayMandySlambergGothicFrogCallingAllZerosFavstar500Favs
  • Llib_Notwal
      Llib Notwal @Llib_Notwal

    After $585,000 night in Paris Hotel, VP Joe Biden has been officially banned from using Priceline's "Name Your Own Price" feature.

    • 30
    • FAVS
    missingblakesDanKCharnleyPYWLCpt_BurnoutVoiceofgartherrogolf__________Australianimalloudlysilent
    • 63
    • RETWEETS
    mattgquayleWR4NYGoverrogolf__________danemadsenTweetaNLATMADevelopmentNeoScandalChristeeeny
  • Llib_Notwal
      Llib Notwal @Llib_Notwal

    I like when baseball players point to the sky after Homeruns to thank and honor Jesus for the sweetass steroids.

    • 61
    • FAVS
    missingblakesDanKCharnleyCpt_BurnoutVoiceofgarthBambamVictoriaPYWLCseashellsprimawesome
    • 26
    • RETWEETS
    geddawy_MariamHakim_hodughXOSarraBethFavstar500FavsTugsMcHamsterDKevinDeanGanderBrecAmended
  • Llib_Notwal
      Llib Notwal @Llib_Notwal

    After I tell my 2yo she's a big help, I always quietly mutter "But not really at all", so it's on record with God what a giant burden she is

    • 64
    • FAVS
    DanKCharnleyVoiceofgarthBambamVictoriaAustralianimalPYWLSlimSlickVicky____fightforfoodMsCarlissima
    • 16
    • RETWEETS
    BambamVictoriaFavstar500FavspeaceandstuffWowItsStephenadrian1903tomgenoniSwollrositaburritknee
    WowItsStephen
  • Llib_Notwal
      Llib Notwal @Llib_Notwal

    If you come to our house, and the toilet paper is on the little roller thing, we are living a lie for your sake. Hope you're happy.

    • 58
    • FAVS
    CSPeskymissingblakesDanKCharnleyVoiceofgarthBambamVictoriaTexMexicanish____PYWLDoneEffedUp
    • 9
    • RETWEETS
    BambamVictoriaFavstar500FavsnPhelendriqaladrian1903abstractephilip_statusQu4rtKn33IndianInlaws______
    IndianInlaws______
  • Llib_Notwal
      Llib Notwal @Llib_Notwal

    When you make a big batch of cookies, you become accustomed to a certain level of cookie availability that just isn't sustainable.

    • 49
    • FAVS
    1followernodaddashflanaganCSPeskymissingblakesStellaGMaddoxaniqfkLarryManwichDanKCharnley
    • 13
    • RETWEETS
    CSPeskyPYWLMrsDevilAngelChuckBaggettTheEsthetesuperseded_HeresDonnyawesomebARTon
  • Llib_Notwal
      Llib Notwal @Llib_Notwal

    Wobbly ceiling fans make me think I'm seconds from being Final Destination'd.

    • 49
    • FAVS
    CSPeskyDanKCharnleyVoiceofgarthBambamVictoriaTexMexicanish____SuziDodt__candypantsbrzandt
    • 13
    • RETWEETS
    SuziDodtbrzandtMozyDSarraBeth_donjuanbby_____bruceleeJones1CookieVangelisthippiechristian
  • Llib_Notwal
      Llib Notwal @Llib_Notwal

    You people who write funny things in like twelve words are borderline wizards to me.

    • 51
    • FAVS
    missingblakesMrJesseHancockDanKCharnleyVoiceofgarthBambamVictoriabrzandtPYWLSheila_Mac420
    • 9
    • RETWEETS
    Favstar500FavsladyjazsjunkChergi_jfAnyaLachae7ArtemisLoudSamson_BainesGinlicker________DrGossSCV
  • Llib_Notwal
      Llib Notwal @Llib_Notwal

    What's with all the April fool's jokes? Wife said it was only March 32nd, so you're all a ... wait a second ... ... that fucking bitch.

    • 45
    • FAVS
    missingblakesDanKCharnleyVoiceofgarthBambamVictoriaPYWLjkann19DoneEffedUpSlimSlickVicky____
    • 14
    • RETWEETS
    cheddarfarmer5NotMadisonXIanTheGreatXdustwindbunJRid23rudejudesgirlMikeStartsWithMStineO
  • Llib_Notwal
      Llib Notwal @Llib_Notwal

    Settle down with the vegetables buckaroo. I said I was eating healthier, not trying to live past 60.

    • 47
    • FAVS
    CSPeskymissingblakesDanKCharnleyVoiceofgarthBambamVictoriaTexMexicanish______candypantsbrzandt
    • 11
    • RETWEETS
    Skunkwadbrzandtlizzsteretmeemlygdwnpuzzy_cutzImCaseyjojacktalkish____
  • Llib_Notwal
      Llib Notwal @Llib_Notwal

    This seems like a lot of work for making 10 people half-heartedly snicker for 1 second, and then forget the incident ever occurred.

    • 44
    • FAVS
    missingblakesDanKCharnleyVoiceofgarthBambamVictoriaTexMexicanish____PYWLSlimSlickVicky____CookieVangelist
    • 9
    • RETWEETS
    FMO_Nickfavstar_popnPhelendriqalRoeDWadeVirtualOatmeallaurawempleDaveofdeadairRideOrDiePudge
    RideOrDiePudge
  • Llib_Notwal
      Llib Notwal @Llib_Notwal

    Hey Africa, don't you hate it when a piece of lettuce in your salad has a tiny bit of brown on it, so you have to throw it all out? I do.

    • 45
    • FAVS
    missingblakesVoiceofgarthBambamVictoriabrzandtPYWLDoneEffedUpfightforfoodCookieVangelist
    • 7
    • RETWEETS
    suzy_saintadrian1903UhhOkayThenMichelleSciencecjjmfgQu4rtKn33SonomaDave
  • Llib_Notwal
      Llib Notwal @Llib_Notwal

    A flat tax? Haven't ladies with small boobies suffered enough?

    • 46
    • FAVS
    missingblakesVoiceofgarthBambamVictoriaAustralianimalTexMexicanish____PYWLJayRose968xCookieVangelist
    • 4
    • RETWEETS
    KevinDeanGandernPhelendriqalShadowplay34Qu4rtKn33
  • Llib_Notwal
      Llib Notwal @Llib_Notwal

    Paterno is a disgusting man, and anyone saying RIP to him is an assho...OMG! Thriller just came on the radio!! That's my jam!! King of Pop!!

    • 33
    • FAVS
    missingblakesVoiceofgarthBambamVictoriaPYWLrobomiyazakifightforfoodCookieVangelistOuterJohn
    • 14
    • RETWEETS
    girlonwryerickenney17ohthatboydjtpont81Mohjo09ThatPenskyFilewhoisTSeevlivingnBoston
  • Llib_Notwal
      Llib Notwal @Llib_Notwal

    The closest I've come to an archaeological dig is trying to get a toy from under the couch with the flyswatter.

    • 42
    • FAVS
    CSPeskyVoiceofgarthBambamVictoriaTexMexicanish____PYWLOuterJohnCthunicornSugarTwoKC________
    • 4
    • RETWEETS
    MandySlambergTiffany_MarieeQu4rtKn33Flirtynfit
  • Llib_Notwal
      Llib Notwal @Llib_Notwal

    I'll admit, at first I wasn't a fan. But more and more, I find myself cheering for this crack to make it to the other side of the windshield

    • 38
    • FAVS
    missingblakesVoiceofgarthBambamVictoriaTexMexicanish____PYWLCookieVangelistOuterJohnIgorLetLoose
    • 7
    • RETWEETS
    Tooltime18jerrysp702lowendofnormalr_wolfcastlearielesusernamenotoriousPOBamberfw
@Llib_Notwal

@Llib_Notwal

I like long walks on the beach, rifling through others belongings for food and money on the beach, and sleeping under a pier with my shopping cart on the beach.