Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
I really hope Ozzies on-field instructions r easier 2 understand than his tweets. I literally have no idea what this dude is talking about..
Hey guys, it's my Birthday! Can I get a RT? #PaybacksaBitch
Ive got a Signed Bat 4 my 50,000th follower & Signed Balls and 8x10's for those I randomly select who've RT'ed & helped the cause the most
"Hey gorgeous, if you were my shin I'd totally bang you on my coffee table" #RejectedPickUpLines
Relationship tip of the day: if ur partner say "I love u" & ur not ready try responding "I love YouTube". 60% of the time it works everytime
Did u know screaming "Get the f*ck out ball" on an airplane at 30,000+ ft is considered in bad taste. I do now... #WorldSeries
Whenever I Google a girl I know, I always put the word "naked" after their name. Just in case...
McKeon asked me what I had going on tonite. Told him I was going home 2 play w/ Twitter. He replied "oh, what kind of dog is it?"
My neighbors cousin's friend has ingrown toenails and is extremely ticklish & my bday is one month from 2day. Can I get a RT?!?
To know me is to Tweet with me! Miami Marlins LF. Twittaholic. I'm not a licensed physician but I'm always down for a game of doctor. I love lamp...