Alligators gonna alligate

I have some good news, and some bad news. And some fairly neutral news. And some unrelated, yet interesting news. And a bagel.

Some people just need a 'loading' symbol hovering in front of their faces.

Nobody is flawed. At most, you can be a deviant from an arbitrary norm created out of accepted social thought and evolutionary programming

Apparently a dog's mouth is cleaner than a human's. But what if its just that we dont understand their curse words?

Does anyone remember the correct usage of the words 'fail' and 'epic'?

So you think you're free? Tweet a 141 character tweet. Go on..

The worst thing you could do is not have a point of view

Actually, its a dog eat dog-food world, for the most part..

How many human sacrifices does it take to form a raincloud?

A hat won't work without gravity

Brains become nice and gooey if marinated in social media for long enough

So everyone on Twitter is trying to be funny?

Siri is telling me to buy Android

Where the hell do all the stones come from during a riot?

Spoiler: you die.

Evolution just decided to go the other way for you, didn't it?

Sometimes, the meaning of a word prevents you from seeing the pure phonetic beauty of it. Like 'unctuous' or 'chafe'..

Nothing's a problem until you categorize it into being one. Everything's perspective, bitches.

It's unreal how unreal reality really is