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I hope a miniature mariachi band comes through the doggy door in your frat house and glues little sombreros on your dicks
God created man in one day? I think this guy next to me on the plane took just 90 seconds in a dirty microwave
I'm wrapping all my fireworks in white bread so these pretentious crowds catch gluten shrapnel.
You wore black jeans to the beach? I'm surprised you didn't just zip yourself up in a black duffle bag and have someone toss you in the sand
The Original Sweaty Back Bastard, Majik Most. 'Molesting HipHop' & 'You Got Jokes?!' In stores, on Itunes, and in your grandmas' purse right now. New album? Hah
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