So the old adage 'if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all' is like, reversed on twitter then?

Brains are great but you better have the beauty to back those fuckers up xx

Fell asleep with the BF's cock in my mouth. Best pacifier ever!

I used to think I thought bad things.
Then I joined twitter.

Sometimes you peeps make me horny.
Sometimes you make me sad.
Sometimes you make me want to LMMFAO.
But you always make me feel something!

Sorry if u turning up 4 our date, being 10 yrs older, 40lbs heavier & still married made me question your integrity. I can be such a bitch

I sure look beautiful for someone so sad. Too conceited? But it's true

Am retiring to my bed to ponder my very existence.
Ok masturbate, whatever.

Over feeling sorry for myself so I'm a gonna go out and get myself completely and utterly raptured and for raptured read shagged senseless!

Love being able to shag with impunity. Well with anyone else too for that matter.

I don't know what I used to do before I found twitter.
Oh yeah, my job.

Boss: suffering from depression. BF: suffering from depression. My work here is done.

Twitter, you are bad.
You make me think bad thoughts.
You make me want bad bad things.
I blame you twitter.
Oh fuck it, Bring it!

G'night Gods and Goddesses. Tonight I am praying that tomorrow I will wake with even more of you beautiful, hilarious followers. (Too much?)

Am having twitter exposure angst.
Am going to run naked up & down the street for a while to get some perspective.

Friend: look this is a 'Korean' style (hairdo for her dog)
Me: No that is an 'I need to step away from the dog and get a fucking life' style

I look fucking gorgeous tonight.

Who said I'm not shallow?

Hmmn beautiful post Easter discount, going to buy me a shitload of creme eggs! So there nasty relatives who gave me none!

Lost some followers & only have a few of you, all of whom I treasure. Is it because I didn't swear enough? Fuck shit wank. Must try harder

P.S. & with 56 million people actively using twitter finding all the fucking gorgeous ones, pervs & freaks was no small acheivement. Yay me!