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I'm doing a shot every time one of my tweets gets a fav or a RT tonight. I'm on my way to really drunk. Try and poison me
I'll settle down when I find someone I can trust to run the music when we are in the car together.
Id marry a Canadian strictly for the breakfast.
That McDonalds fish McBites commercial should play everytime someone takes a dirty girl home. Fishy fishay
This is baseball. I fucking love this game
If you send a dick pic today and don't caption it "he has risen" you are doing Easter wrong.
The worst part of getting your heart broken is how it made you hate your favorite song.
Sloppy Joes are very under rated in the food world.
This game doesn't count because Staind sang the national anthem.
Wearing pants in bed is like wearing socks with sandals. It just shouldn't be done. It's wrong.
"Guys are dicks. Guys are assholes. Why can't I find a good guy?"
Let me screen shot a dude trying to talk to me and make fun of him.
"I like dark beer, what do you have?"
I list our beers.
"I'll have a bud light"
Baseball fan, music lover, bartender, beard haver and an all around good guy. Willie Nelson is my homeboy.
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