Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
Spent the last 2 hours trying to set fire to the rain. Adele is full of shit.
If u r arguing w/ some1 u don't no very well, try out this line for a sure victory: "wow, what a shitty way to spend my birthday :-( "
Sure, I've never boxed before, but I am in a mugh higher weight class than Floyd Mayweather Jr so I would just pummel him if we ever fought!
The Universe is 70 billion light years wide & my wife is worried about a small dent in the car?!? C'mon babe! What's the big picture here!?
I wish there was a radio station that only played the empowering, inspirational background music they play on credit card commercials!
Does anyone know where I can find a GOOD Male Nursing Bra?
If you feel passionate about something, there's no reason why you shouldn't get into a shouting match during a job interview.
I could go ALL NIGHT in the club. Assuming "the club" is a never-ending bowl of delicious Frosted Flakes cereal with soy milk.
This is a mass message to all my close friends and loved ones: I am stranded at this autobody shop and f%#& all of you.
The thing about buying a used car is you have NO IDEA how much the old owner farted in it.
*Rushes out of bed to get McD's breakfast* *Looks at clock* 10:26 *tears up* I am trapped in morning hell.
1 of my biggest fears is filling up a car tire so full it pops as I fill it. I usually get dizzy from blowing before it gets to that point.
Those hits like Maldonado's were the only hits I'd get when I played high school ball #brewers
Michael just launched his cap and forgot to take the tassel off. Could see that comin' from a mile away (because I did that too)
Whoever said “teeth are not tools” has obviously never been to the DMV.
I really wish they had an elevator at the YMCA
Those ten day beers today kinda killed my diet.
Bruce just took 4oz of white gold (breastmilk) straight to the dome.
Accounting Connoisseur. I take NOTHING seriously *dead stare* I'm not your father's CPA. . . unless you put in a good word for me !! http://www.taxrelaxer.com