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If this essay gives me a papercut I'll have the trifecta.
Also maybe tell Natalie that i didn't have a ride this morning and am super late to class but there's an essay in my hand
I accidentally spilled white mocha. customer says "well that looks disgustingly familiar." Good to know, stranger.
How to transition to wearing blazers on a regular basis: an everyday dilemma for Michael Carver Simmons
Taking about getting into bars: "well i have my paper ID; i look a lot like Benjamin Franklin" -tex
"i wanna play like stereotypes ya know?... The gangster, the Stoner..." -Tex, naturally
What the fuck brain? I just heard a noise like a firecracker going off in my head. It's silent in here
I now know how it is on heaven. wonderful show everyone!
guy needed an extra cup because he's "going to get some hot liquid later". I just make the coffee I don't ask questions
Walked past some people talking about "x and y" and i thought Pokemon but nope, algebra. Now i don't know which one of us is the bigger nerd