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My porn name is weird because my middle name is "Magic" and the street I grew up on was "Johnson has AIDS." #angelosjokes
Everything smells like mezcal right now.
Amy Adams' ass in those pilot pants is the one redeeming thing about Night at the Museum. Maybe the monkey.
Got Sade on the brain. The Deftones cover will have to do for now.
High Violet is the best driving in the rain album. #SortItOut
You eat watermelon after 11 you pee all night.
Johnathan Quick is a beast. Bitch goalies like Luongo could learn something. #StanleyCup
Is there anything more gross than Vienna sausage fat jelly