@Miss_Cook's most faved Tweets...
Wow, it's beautiful outside. I should probably do something. Like close the blinds so there isn't a glare on my screen.
Facebook is where mothers post about their little angels. Twitter is where mothers reveal what soul sucking little shits kids really are.
Why are you arguing about the existence of god on facebook? You play mafia wars for fucks sake. I doubt even Jesus would take you seriously.
Oh sure, you dip lobster in butter and you're "classy" but I dip my cheeseburger in butter and I'm "fat".
You can post about your love of god on facebook all you want, but *I* remember your love of going down on random guys at frat parties. Amen.
I may be a little off base here, but I don't think the point of those personal breathalyzers is trying to beat your old score.
Hey guys, did you know orange juice and champagne is called a mimosa? And all this time I've been calling it breakfast....
Sarah Palin claims she didn't know her daughter was having sex. In her defense, it wasn't like there were any empty condom wrappers to find.
My mom just called to see if I wanted to go to Wal-Mart. I'm gonna tell her to fuck off as soon as I can stop laughing.
I want to go down on some pie until it's screaming for mercy. That's not a euphemism for hot lesbian sex. I'm just fat and want some pie.
Sarah Palin's new book is called "Going Rouge". I hear her daughter is writing the sequel, with the tentative title "Riding Bareback".
Wonder if tools who star Jonas Brothers' tweets realize their avatars show up on favstar? It only makes spotting them easier with my rifle.
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