I'm sorry I can't always say something funny. Please don't leave me. It's awful lonely without you all.

I don't follow people because of their avi....unless you're a chick with big boobies. Then maybe I do..

You gain some followers. You lose some followers... Either way, no body likes you.

I wish I had the power to fly. That would be the coolest way to leave an awkward conversation.

Yeah bro cool story. *flaps wings slowly*

I act older than what I am, except in public, or on my xbox, or in life.... Wait, well who needs to grow up?

I ain't racist, I'm just nignorant.

Hope I can keep up all this motivation and umpf...because without it I have nothing.

If you act like I am in the wrong, that says a lot more.

You tell me to do something, I do it, you say it is an inconvenience to you. I am done slapping on a smile. Even if it means being alone.

Coffee... Is my crack... And my colon cleanser. Lmao.

@vampiliciousxo is it bad that I blushed? I didn't know I had that emotion..

Lesson learned. You really can't rely on anyone but yourself. #badmood

It's funny how life plays itself out.

Can't I have like 300 extra bucks laying around??? Fml.

Bunches and bunches of cocky mo fos everywhere...ah the army life.

Hate waking up and my body goes, "hey remember that shit you had to take? No? Well here lemme remind you." No, body, I have to leave.

#ff @angry_vet_ @thatfinguy @token_geezer @hipchkk @justasmirk @mike_wrong @shoutinggoddess

Keep entertained while you touch yourself!!

Unrelated, what gets followers to become interested in this following nonsense? Hmm. Probably buttsecs and big tits.

Woke up with this crazy dream of being stalked. That's the last time I read my twitter before passing out. Creepsters.

Everyday I become more and bore the worst parent in the world. According to my mother.