Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
Wrestling. It's a lot like gay sex, except way more gay.
I used to have sex with this guy who always took a shower right afterwards. So yeah, priests sure do like hygiene.
Straight guy: I want to bang those Victoria's Secret models!
Me: I want those wings, they're fucking adorable!
A gay guy told me Lady Gaga was better than Madonna. I pulled his hair. Then we had sex. I love stereotypes.
My tweets aren't so much tweets as they are anagrams of satanic verses.
If you're a gay guy, there is no second base. If the bats are out, you better get ready for some innings.
Are you the boy or the girl? - My grandma, asking about my sex life
It's too beautiful to stay inside today. That's why I moved my bed closer to the window.
People who tell you not to mix alcohol and pills just want you to be unhappy.
Eating pussy is obviously something straight guys do. Gay guys would have used a prettier term for it, like polishing a love cave.
I usually pray the gay away after sex cause I don't want to share my weed.
Someone said something. I'll drink to that!
My Twitter crush sends me a tweet every once in a while but I also enjoy the silent treatment. It makes the whole thing more lifelike.
Hey, "straight" guys who tweet about the Emmy's: Lady Gaga wrote a song for you.
I call my orgasms poorgasms. Cause I like to jack off on homeless people.
I wonder how long it'll take until Demi Moore realizes there's an even younger guy on Two and a Half Men she could fuck.
So wait, a lot of people in America are unemployed and the one's who have a job tweet all day long? Huh.
There's something really sad about drinking alone in your bedroom. That's why I made little dolls of my Twitter friends and drink with them.
Do you want so see a picture of my face covered in cum?
Then fuck off with your baby pictures.
I like unicorns, bad dick jokes and blasphemy. I co-founded the #UnicornGang with @WhoCuppedMyCake