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"@rolldiggity: On a scale from 1 to fire hydrant, how good am I at inventing scales?" I'd say pet rock
"@lmaotwitpics: Captcha Code Fail http://bit.ly/fcI7Kt" @abortionpancake @bobajeno @therabear420
Growing up I wanted to be an Astronaut, after several trips to amusement parks and vomiting from the g force I realized you can't be what ever you want
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