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  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    Hubby: "Why don't you ever tell me when you have an orgasm?"
    Wife: "I don't want to bother you while you are at work."

    • 2,166
    • FAVS
    HiddleDeeDeeshift2blueScdavis24HabsFanAlways3baybaystepsFuzzy_sueHardluck_Boybrittneycrow95
    • 1,061
    • RETWEETS
    shift2blueScdavis24Fuzzy_sue_dee_essCletusHammerRAYDONRUSHDukEB51Northside_Mike
    Northside_MikeRyanAndrewMitchworley_7BillArrundaleGrumpyCommentsJenny4ashleyMr_goose007NoLuckWantedComedyCarterlucyworld1_InsanelyNormal__Parentpainsmrtruthandsoulchopper4jkilovepie84NoLuckNeededJust_Lee_1lllvvvzzzFilthyJeepGirlRudeRidingRomeofluffysuseakarmutttreydaywayAlbertaChriscixelsidgod______eliserose5_SirPrincessTetley6969GeneralGreviousMyLongBalls
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    Dear Alcohol, we had a deal. u were suppose 2 make me funnier, smarter & put me in a good mood.... I saw the photos - we need to talk.

    • 1,851
    • FAVS
    Beau_jangledLilBadGurllScdavis24Fuzzy_suevest_annaRissa4CaultDukEB51Northside_Mike
    • 1,067
    • RETWEETS
    Scdavis24Fuzzy_sueAndira110CletusHammerDukEB51Northside_MikeTheMistaJeffRayBuzzee09
    mrt1mNoLuckWantedJenny4ashleyNot_From_TroyA_SmartAssStevie_TalkBrianhopecomedylucyworld1Mr_goose007drunkNnaughty_SirPrincess_wangweTuna_LoverRamblingMachine__lllvvvzzzMasqueradedLady__Blondiethegoodsee_more13EatingZebras______Jennifergr8ParentpainszgbettyJazzzzzminachrisanna4realCarter_TCBThe_MartiniGirlExploringUrMindMattDaddyO________
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    6% of men enjoy a bj for sexual satisfaction, 6% enjoy it for visual stimulation and the other 88% just enjoy it for the peace & quiet...

    • 1,686
    • FAVS
    katieatlassavage_wienerFuzzy_sue_dee_esspiyush_poohcigarinRissa4CaultNorthside_Mike
    • 1,166
    • RETWEETS
    savage_wienerFloydSmitheeFuzzy_suepiyush_poohcigarinCletusHammerejmichaels1MiltonYatich
    QwertyJones3Dong_HangerNoLuckWantedjoeldangerVikeeysSecretsiavalalllvvvzzz_SirPrincessGrowingUpScottyTEXASVETERANFannyB1tch________Token_GeezerMutedBSartistBillFienbergsee_more13Supersurlychopper4jkiheartguntsJonCantTweetscratchysinghzachreinert03thetobbieAlbertaChris
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    Anal sex is not for pussies

    • 1,466
    • FAVS
    HabsFanAlways3Fuzzy_sueJaybrahamAlHumphriesDukEB51Northside_MikePanicRestroomTwo_sneaks
    • 737
    • RETWEETS
    jjeremy900Fuzzy_sueShelleyBesselWhat_Fuckin_EvaDukEB51Northside_MikePhinallyHeresevenxx7
    lovablelucasilluminatedwndrLitra_In_Denial__BBQJones28________avaricious1Schmoodles________see_more13zachreinert03YouFuckingWonEvilPandaXTetley6969Mr_goose007
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    My twitter crush just DM'd me a dick pic. I said I would love to see that erect. He blocked me...

    • 1,153
    • FAVS
    Fuzzy_suecigarinNorthside_Mikeejmichaels1Two_sneaksStupidSophia_darlingshelly72nyax6
    • 342
    • RETWEETS
    Fuzzy_suecigarinejmichaels1Two_sneaksMissStishanyax6Jojo_51213pritamJAYKAR
    see_more13Hello_BellaHeyZeus666RichHarris2hidingfrommeToken_Geezer
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    I'm gonna drink myself single...

    • 1,103
    • FAVS
    Fuzzy_sueNorthside_MikeStupidSophia_MelanieJoMooreABnonymousCheysc4lif0rnia23ManginaMcCoolTabiEvans
    • 350
    • RETWEETS
    Fuzzy_sueSmooheedSkyHighCutie7DrFapFapJojo_51213li4mst3w4rtChipKellysBallsJeeepsta
    osigatMyLoveGoesDown____5haelNotKarmathedayofthedotgreen_babe_ddscrapsquashguy15DrThanatosClare_innitdjr_102
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    I sit for 15 minutes laughing at my own tweet. Then read it to my husband who looks at me in confusion...

    • 1,021
    • FAVS
    Fuzzy_sueTwo_sneaksStupidSophia_Smooheedsevenxx7nyax6DrFapFapJojo_51213
    • 289
    • RETWEETS
    deegeemindiFuzzy_sueCherBear1621evilidiotZJax02SquizbotBeer4AGoodTimePhoenixRises69
    InThaBurbsNoorShammaWeissBrandon______Hello_BellaAristotlesNZ______LuvPugHoGoLightlyPatStar14GeneralGrevious
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    Never let someone cure your insanity. It's what makes you who you are. What is a mind without a bit of insanity? Lifeless. Boring. Dead...

    • 785
    • FAVS
    incognytoedaphygirl74Fuzzy_sueejmichaels1StupidSophia_SmooheedMzCocoaBlacknicolbrooke
    • 479
    • RETWEETS
    daphygirl74Fuzzy_sueejmichaels1Peanut_WyoDaddyJewTiA_PiNkY_MaRiEVyfie_NSolgadoMarley
    thetobbieJT_IV__jennjennNJFreudianFloatersfinestrachiecandiceKPsych29__________justmebreathingMyRedHairIsRealhoneybadgerMelPeaceInTruth1AbeeGeorgina______Tinkerbell_EvilPandaX
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    I snort glitter. I want to be beautiful inside and out...

    • 832
    • FAVS
    TheBlessMess187GoFastTheRealRHBLilbyrdyslyoung5DamnPutnamGirlFuzzy_sueCrissyFlorencia
    • 313
    • RETWEETS
    slyoung5dinesh_chaudhRiFuzzy_sueTreeGroupieLolaLuxxeStupidSophia_daredoubleyouDanaTicer
    NoLuckWantedlloydranggidget_76iBrowniEd2michamontaz_Prozach74________
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    It's not that men don't understand women. Men don't understand Anyone. Not even themselves. Just give em a break n let em jizz on your face

    • 739
    • FAVS
    Fuzzy_sueTwo_sneaksStupidSophia_nyax6Jojo_51213ChipKellysBallsCletusHammerReeseButCallMeV
    • 398
    • RETWEETS
    Fuzzy_sueTwo_sneaksnyax6ZJax02mahatmatweeterCherBear162Ndive1312Squizbot
    worley_7DaddyJewMr_goose007Naggalie__________zachreinert03slyoung5_SirPrincess
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    Without fools the rest of us could not succeed

    • 785
    • FAVS
    StephmulzFuzzy_sueTwo_sneaksnaeem_omargouravmalhotraolita81robftw73elguacamole
    • 300
    • RETWEETS
    dinesh_chaudhRiFuzzy_suepratyu999olita81SummerLynne76LuvPugnyax6ReeseButCallMeV
    Mr_goose007getta_grip_onItaltheneThateverydayguyNoorShammaPeterJPappas_xLNcsee_more13Muath_tu__________PeaceInTruth1KDsMorningBoomBamBunnymdvaldosta
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    If I unfollow you I accept your apology, for boring me...

    • 698
    • FAVS
    Fuzzy_sueunderyourbed666JT_IV_lacrossemom5Kidradikulmauson_MyUglyMustacheEveryoneLoveCox
    • 296
    • RETWEETS
    Fuzzy_sueToxicButTastyReeseButCallMeVJT_IV_RealJinjaNinjaRickyScampEdgarKevinMothoni_
    Alyssa_JolieiLightbulb________iAmJuddygaliamangoHonestMisssilent_musings
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    I Don't get why ppl are scared to RT. Do u want to keep your followers to yourself? Ppl have the Right to see how Funny I Am.
    Cunt!

    • 604
    • FAVS
    TheBlessMessCrissC32slyoung5Fuzzy_sueJT_IV_Two_sneaksiamMungaSmooheed
    • 348
    • RETWEETS
    TheRealRHBslyoung5Fuzzy_sueiamMungaDrFapFapgun5hy3FRANKSTALICIOUSZJax02
    MouthOfSassYearOfRat
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    I star'd a girl and I
    Liked it....

    • 723
    • FAVS
    Bulldog0613Fuzzy_sueJT_IV_DaddyJewsevenxx7nyax6lasergirl70JesseeRaee
    • 173
    • RETWEETS
    Fuzzy_suelasergirl70DrFapFapZJax02Shwento__________pcarysheltonPsychographEdiamMunga
    lucyworld1CarpentersCrack
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    I don't really give a fuck what you think of me. Unless you think I'm smart, pretty, sexy, funny, awesome. Then yes, you would be correct.

    • 555
    • FAVS
    GoryEyesCaptHalJordanSeanD1111OhgoddessitsmeFuzzy_suegmossiiToxicButTastyBackpackerBooie
    • 308
    • RETWEETS
    OhgoddessitsmeFuzzy_sueIveryDWmsIIIToxicButTastyMkjkfitzgeraldAlpha_Sitsoadamwt1978Just_Lee_
    The_MartiniGirlJust_Lee_SmooheedMr_goose007TheMichaelRockNoLuckWantedLoli_Sug
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    Ten percent of something is better than 100% of nothing

    • 652
    • FAVS
    Fuzzy_suellvvzzJatinK11MmeLaCroozallthingspoeticLooseTalks_GirlStrauchdieb91thulnicolle
    • 208
    • RETWEETS
    Fuzzy_sueMillsyyyyStillElle_Deethulnicolleslyoung5ToxicButTastyslotjunkierosextothevee
    JT_IV_sweetg35Just_Lee_1Bacon_Ball________scratchysinghredpawn3AintNoGlueSergioValenCo
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    Cum is in the eye of the blowjobber...

    • 642
    • FAVS
    TheBlessMessN_Makhayesarybear22cwiggimsslyoung5Fuzzy_sueJT_IV_MuddledRed
    • 161
    • RETWEETS
    AutoCutter1slyoung5Fuzzy_sueTwo_sneaksiamMunganyax6ZJax02Squizbot
    nerfspur
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    The secret to success is not to tell anyone about it

    • 469
    • FAVS
    Fuzzy_sueJT_IV_MuddledRedPrefersSleepsumpeoplelikeitxosmfiffyjosarybear22
    • 318
    • RETWEETS
    Fuzzy_sueBarbzthegreatzolofighterMoi_RaRaRainbowLorikee1BREATHEURSIGHiamMunganyax6
    tissytassy13______drunkNnaughtyj_luce3Thedudish
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    TwitterCrush's are for amateurs, they don't do much. I have a TwitterWhore. He Stars and RT's all my shit...

    • 613
    • FAVS
    argenllupiFuzzy_sueJT_IV_Two_sneaksiamMungaSmooheedDaddyJewnyax6
    • 162
    • RETWEETS
    Fuzzy_sueiamMungatexasstalkermomDoubletap6xDrFapFapZJax02Squizbotronniesorter
    willoffendyou
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    My TwitterCrush just DM'd me. Admitting he was a she...

    Meh... As long as you keep the same Avi I don't care...

    • 576
    • FAVS
    FasterMKsteviethekFuzzy_sueJT_IV_Smooheednyax6DrFapFapli4mst3w4rt
    • 136
    • RETWEETS
    Fuzzy_sueFinnMcIverFloatersfinestTinkerbell_ZJax02SquizbotGirliegurllBareChesty
    redpawn3YearOfRat
@MrsGoose69

@MrsGoose69
Pro

I'm here to be me. Not you, ME! So shut it and move along. Kids don't follow, somethings your parents should teach you Not me.