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  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    Hubby: "Why don't you ever tell me when you have an orgasm?"
    Wife: "I don't want to bother you while you are at work."

    • 2,243
    • FAVS
    OreoSpeedwagon_pauvrecouerBitchKittyVhbreaker9999JerryEastwoodBmoreArticulatelungman72whitemaleslave2
    • 1,096
    • RETWEETS
    thetobbiertsBob_Mcgroaryhbreaker9999LakerbebeBmoreArticulatelungman72Josephmisiurbbyvelociraptor
    thetobbieNorthside_MikeRyanAndrewMitchworley_7BillArrundaleGrumpyCommentsJenny4ashleyMr_goose007NoLuckWantedComedyCarterlucyworld1_InsanelyNormal__Parentpainsmrtruthandsoulchopper4jkilovepie84NoLuckNeededJust_Lee_1lllvvvzzzFilthyJeepGirlRudeRidingRomeofluffysuseakarmutttreydaywayAlbertaChriscixelsidgod______eliserose5_SirPrincessTetley6969GeneralGreviousMyLongBalls
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    Dear Alcohol, we had a deal. u were suppose 2 make me funnier, smarter & put me in a good mood.... I saw the photos - we need to talk.

    • 1,874
    • FAVS
    CastorenaAlexisTyler_DaysmwosKaliphthechefbakesFatMcButterPantjavadewdSapphireBelJonesysWorld
    • 1,084
    • RETWEETS
    SnehaNaiduTyler_Daystday912iamgurpLinuslettingjavadewdSnitfitCallumMoore_LFC
    mrt1mNoLuckWantedJenny4ashleyNot_From_TroyA_SmartAssStevie_TalkBrianhopecomedylucyworld1Mr_goose007drunkNnaughty_SirPrincess_wangweTuna_LoverRamblingMachine__lllvvvzzzMasqueradedLady__Blondiethegoodsee_more13EatingZebras______Jennifergr8ParentpainszgbettyJazzzzzminachrisanna4realCarter_TCBThe_MartiniGirlExploringUrMindMattDaddyO________
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    6% of men enjoy a bj for sexual satisfaction, 6% enjoy it for visual stimulation and the other 88% just enjoy it for the peace & quiet...

    • 1,722
    • FAVS
    ColinBevis1poeticshadow_clavon28paulwilloJesseMalachiODebHawk12ateatrayzolofighter
    • 1,183
    • RETWEETS
    Rusty_SwillDebHawk12zolofighterrandom_tammieHarlowePilgrimOrgasmsMindtripdad_divorcedSufficientCharm
    QwertyJones3Dong_HangerNoLuckWantedjoeldangerVikeeysSecretsiavalalllvvvzzz_SirPrincessGrowingUpScottyTEXASVETERANFannyB1tch________Token_GeezerMutedBSartistBillFienbergsee_more13Supersurlychopper4jkiheartguntsJonCantTweetscratchysinghzachreinert03thetobbieAlbertaChris
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    Anal sex is not for pussies

    • 1,493
    • FAVS
    emfo33the2horseman69DanieChaseTweet_MeeJames_McBurnienewstart43BGH70AllaHbaster
    • 752
    • RETWEETS
    iamgurpDroppin_BHOmbsJames_McBurnienewstart43AllaHbasterashlar36hsskiteammascotLuAngeles
    lovablelucasilluminatedwndrLitra_In_Denial__BBQJones28________avaricious1DavidOzmundsee_more13zachreinert03YouFuckingWonEvilPandaXTetley6969Mr_goose007
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    My twitter crush just DM'd me a dick pic. I said I would love to see that erect. He blocked me...

    • 1,166
    • FAVS
    HanafHanafHelenaHartUthe2horseman69Tweet_Meenewstart43AllaHbasterCrazy8s_dbcrapwell
    • 349
    • RETWEETS
    HispanicIconiamgurpinkonsekvenshennewstart43AllaHbasterwolfpack197721RealJinjaNinjaKamakazi_Mina
    see_more13Hello_BellaHeyZeus666RichHarris2hidingfrommeToken_Geezer
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    I'm gonna drink myself single...

    • 1,126
    • FAVS
    charrrllaathechefbakesgorgeouscompanythe2horseman69Raid1968newstart43poshbirdgabiAllaHbaster
    • 359
    • RETWEETS
    HispanicIconiamgurpnewstart43AllaHbasterwolfpack197721RealJinjaNinjaDRAAKARMANbaddgalgigi
    osigatMyLoveGoesDown____5haelNotKarmathedayofthedotgreen_babe_ddscrapsquashguy15DrThanatosClare_innitdjr_102
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    I sit for 15 minutes laughing at my own tweet. Then read it to my husband who looks at me in confusion...

    • 1,028
    • FAVS
    Crazy8s_dbcrapwellwolfpack197721JaniceLReadtraceyritaRealJinjaNinjaTangyToastKamakazi_Mina
    • 292
    • RETWEETS
    iamgurpwolfpack197721RealJinjaNinjadeegeemindiKamakazi_MinaCherBear1621evilidiotZJax02
    InThaBurbsNoorShammaWeissBrandon______Hello_BellaAristotlesNZ______LuvPugHoGoLightlyPatStar14GeneralGrevious
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    Never let someone cure your insanity. It's what makes you who you are. What is a mind without a bit of insanity? Lifeless. Boring. Dead...

    • 791
    • FAVS
    Tyler_DaysCrazy8s_lucyworld1wolfpack197721RealJinjaNinjaTangyToastincognytoedaphygirl74
    • 484
    • RETWEETS
    SnehaNaiduTyler_Daysiamgurpwolfpack197721RealJinjaNinjadaphygirl74Kamakazi_Minaejmichaels1
    thetobbieJT_IV__jennjennNJFreudianFloatersfinestrachiecandiceKPsych29__________justmebreathingMyRedHairIsRealhoneybadgerMelPeaceInTruth1AbeeGeorgina______Tinkerbell_EvilPandaX
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    I snort glitter. I want to be beautiful inside and out...

    • 838
    • FAVS
    Tyler_DaysCrazy8s_wolfpack197721shita3yosaysRealJinjaNinjaTangyToastTheBlessMess187GoFast
    • 319
    • RETWEETS
    SnehaNaiduTyler_DaysiamgurpBadass_Brunelliwolfpack197721RealJinjaNinjaslyoung5dinesh_chaudhRi
    NoLuckWantedlloydranggidget_76iBrowniEd2michamontaz_Prozach74________
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    It's not that men don't understand women. Men don't understand Anyone. Not even themselves. Just give em a break n let em jizz on your face

    • 744
    • FAVS
    Crazy8s_bloggingbroadwolfpack197721RealJinjaNinjaTangyToastKamakazi_MinaTwo_sneaksStupidSophia_
    • 401
    • RETWEETS
    iamgurpwolfpack197721RealJinjaNinjaKamakazi_MinaTwo_sneaksnyax6ZJax02mahatmatweeter
    worley_7DaddyJewMr_goose007Naggalie__________zachreinert03slyoung5_SirPrincess
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    Without fools the rest of us could not succeed

    • 795
    • FAVS
    Crazy8s_SassyTexasGalNursey2Belucyworld1Smooheedwolfpack197721DoggNinja____RealJinjaNinja
    • 306
    • RETWEETS
    iamgurplucyworld1Buzzee09wolfpack197721DoggNinja____RealJinjaNinjadinesh_chaudhRiKamakazi_Mina
    Mr_goose007getta_grip_onItaltheneThateverydayguyNoorShammaPeterJPappas_xLNcsee_more13Muath_tu__________PeaceInTruth1KDsMorningBoomBamBunnymdvaldosta
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    If I unfollow you I accept your apology, for boring me...

    • 703
    • FAVS
    Crazy8s_Nursey2Bewolfpack197721RealJinjaNinjaTangyToastKamakazi_Minaunderyourbed666JT_IV_
    • 299
    • RETWEETS
    iamgurpBuzzee09wolfpack197721Kamakazi_MinaToxicButTastyReeseButCallMeVJT_IV_RealJinjaNinja
    Alyssa_JolieiLightbulb________iAmJuddygaliamangoHonestMisssilent_musings
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    I Don't get why ppl are scared to RT. Do u want to keep your followers to yourself? Ppl have the Right to see how Funny I Am.
    Cunt!

    • 610
    • FAVS
    Crazy8s_wolfpack197721adamwt1978JaeMar68MissMalbecTangyToastTheBlessMessSummerFun32
    • 354
    • RETWEETS
    iamgurpwolfpack197721Hamza_tariqJaeMar68MissMalbecRealJinjaNinjaTheRealRHBslyoung5
    MouthOfSassYearOfRat
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    I star'd a girl and I
    Liked it....

    • 739
    • FAVS
    valzhoganDrBoozenitCheeseboy22chantal_devoTnucTewnewstart43Hates_Ketchupchicnlil1
    • 179
    • RETWEETS
    TnucTewnewstart43thatUPSdudeiamgurpwolfpack197721RealJinjaNinjaKamakazi_Minalasergirl70
    lucyworld1CarpentersCrack
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    I don't really give a fuck what you think of me. Unless you think I'm smart, pretty, sexy, funny, awesome. Then yes, you would be correct.

    • 583
    • FAVS
    Decadent_n_MoreMidniteMassagebrianfergy2valzhoganDrBoozenitBeingAllyMooreOntheHunt13newstart43
    • 327
    • RETWEETS
    BeingAllyMooreOntheHunt13newstart43ashrussellllvivianayee_0EmmyEm_KendraKensingtojoeisnothere
    The_MartiniGirlJust_Lee_SmooheedMr_goose007TheMichaelRockNoLuckWantedLoli_Sug
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    Ten percent of something is better than 100% of nothing

    • 664
    • FAVS
    Crazy8s_Nursey2Belucyworld1wolfpack197721JaniceLReadDoggNinja____RealJinjaNinjaTangyToast
    • 216
    • RETWEETS
    iamgurplucyworld1wolfpack197721DoggNinja____RealJinjaNinjaRonak65767rupal_87_definitlymaybe
    JT_IV_sweetg35Just_Lee_1Bacon_Ball________scratchysinghredpawn3AintNoGlueSergioValenCo
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    The secret to success is not to tell anyone about it

    • 484
    • FAVS
    7sChrisMillerThe_GetawayGirlPaulMMonaghantzeneggt0shibaCrazy8s_skivyywolfpack197721
    • 329
    • RETWEETS
    favstar_historyiamgurpChivetteAndreaPaulMMonaghanbluntprincesaschiggymslindzewolfpack197721
    tissytassy13______drunkNnaughtyj_luce3Thedudish
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    Cum is in the eye of the blowjobber...

    • 645
    • FAVS
    Crazy8s_dbcrapwellTangyToastTheBlessMessN_Makhayesarybear22cwiggimsslyoung5
    • 162
    • RETWEETS
    iamgurpAutoCutter1slyoung5Kamakazi_MinaTwo_sneaksiamMunganyax6ZJax02
    nerfspur
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    TwitterCrush's are for amateurs, they don't do much. I have a TwitterWhore. He Stars and RT's all my shit...

    • 615
    • FAVS
    Crazy8s_TangyToastargenllupiKamakazi_MinaJT_IV_Two_sneaksiamMungaSmooheed
    • 163
    • RETWEETS
    iamgurpKamakazi_MinaiamMungatexasstalkermomDoubletap6xDrFapFapZJax02Squizbot
    willoffendyou
  • MrsGoose69
      MrsG @MrsGoose69

    My TwitterCrush just DM'd me. Admitting he was a she...

    Meh... As long as you keep the same Avi I don't care...

    • 579
    • FAVS
    Crazy8s_wolfpack197721TangyToastFasterMKsteviethekKamakazi_MinaJT_IV_Smooheed
    • 138
    • RETWEETS
    iamgurpwolfpack197721Kamakazi_MinaFinnMcIverFloatersfinestTinkerbell_ZJax02Squizbot
    redpawn3YearOfRat
@MrsGoose69

@MrsGoose69

I'm here to be me. So shut it and move along. Kids don't follow, somethings your parents should teach you Not me.