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I'M BEING RAPTURED! My body is floating up towards the heav... no, wait I've just stepped on the escalator at Debenhams. False alarm. Sorry.
RT @metallicab Ryan Giggs photo on the front page of a newspaper somewhere http://yfrog.com/h8x9nxvj #superinjunction going well then
“@cabinboy100 Thespians,assemble! @josswhedon #MyMuchAdoPoster #NotGonnaClearLegalButICouldntHelpMyself pic.twitter.com/6ZCq2l5Q6s” @whedonesque
BREAKING NEWS : American cartoon show inadvertently creates animated @rufushound http://t.co/pcKFqvOj
In other news Simon Cowell is a childrens-charity bullying wanker of the highest order. #CowellMustPay - http://t.co/LNAkeKa8
Hello Twitter, can you help me find some work? If you could RT my Gumtree ad that would be blimmin' aces. http://t.co/GZPoZLOp
It's Stevie Wonder's birthday today? On Friday the 13th? That's not good given that he is so VERY Superstitious.
Rupert Murdoch gets served by Jon Snow. Gawd bless the internet. http://t.co/L92gIVe8
Remember, everytime you do that Star Wars joke today you owe George Lucas 50p for copyright fees. He uses the money to buy Curly Wurlys.
Wow! Awful PR and customer relations email courtesy of @oceanmarketting, nice work guys.
http://t.co/YfcPUdd9
It’s all a big typo. The Mayans actually predicted the end of The Word. Fortunately for us that show finished ages ago.
Hello @gbarlowofficial Did you know your TV show has dumped an £8k bill in the lap of a kids charity? #CowellMustPay - http://t.co/LNAkeKa8”
Hey Twitter, can you help me find a job? If you could RT my Gumtree ad my hungry family* will love you forever. http://t.co/GZPoZLOp
Have you seen the graffiti on the spot where George Michaels hit that shop? http://twitpic.com/2oqk9v
Did I share this already? It doesn’t matter, it’s still aces. An awesome re-work of Rock With You by @thereflexmusic http://soundcloud.com/thereflex/rock-with-you-o-the-reflex-re …
People fretting that Disney will milk Star Wars to death. Yeah right coz Angry Birds Star Wars isn't a sign of a milked-to-death franchise.
UK based freelance writer, occasional blog monkey, part-time DJ (http://www.djpaulnelson.com) and permanent waste of everyones time on Twitter.
