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Gta V = $64.00,
Two McDoubles = $2.17,
Thank you, Based God.
I'll take a martini please. 'Can I see some photo ID?' I'll take an apple juice please.
It's too hot in Arizona to be wearing any article of clothing
Where is the cocaine emoji?
Legalize medical cocaine
Snapchatting in public is weird and it will never not be weird
In the year 2069 I will have a reason to laugh every day.
My biggest pet peeve is when people exclaim their pet peeves. My second pet peeves is hypocrites. A close third is paradoxes.
It's always a sad day when you leave somewhere that isn't Arizona to go back to Arizona.
I would much rather have my friends addicted to cocaine or heroin before getting addicted to Candy Crush
Everyone at Ironwood looks like they just walked out of a Niki Minaj concert.
I almost thought about going to Ironwood's homecoming, but then I realized that would require me to go to Ironwood's homecoming.
I'm allergic to basic bitches sorry
I just want to make bad decisions with my friends and some strangers, is that really all too bad?
Dear girls who want to cut your hair short, resist the urge.