@thetomska Here's how I asked my whole school's population to prom! http://t.co/vUZ4lY9g

@thetomska I'm not sure if you're aware, but ASDF is leaking. http://t.co/8O8HOfwm

Where is the cocaine emoji?

@mattlobster Commissioner Gordon, Commissioner Lobster, Commissioner Cake. http://t.co/R3nQ70Gl

My biggest pet peeve is when people exclaim their pet peeves. My second pet peeves is hypocrites. A close third is paradoxes.

Putting these prom flyers up around school pic.twitter.com/iJs7boYxo3

Now that @cinnabon is following me I really want to kiss someone. Preferably this cinnamon roll.

Everyone at Ironwood looks like they just walked out of a Niki Minaj concert.

Dear girls who want to cut your hair short, resist the urge.

I have an uneasy and sudden urge to go mini golfing.

The real tragedy of my cat dying was trying to fit him down the toilet.

#incomingfreshmanadvice don't go to graduation practice

#incomingfreshmanadvice If you have a camera on you, it is a pass that will allow you to literally go and do anything on campus.

'Nathan Schulte pounds massive flesh vacuum' coming soon to a RedTube near you. pic.twitter.com/52bRLjC2Re

My goal tonight is to take a picture with every single person attending Ironwood's prom.

GET HOME GET NAKED

High school is almost over for me and it's truly a bitter sweet moment, except without the bitterness.

A girl was hitting on me and asked for my number once, and a friend told me to give her a fake one so I told her sixty gazillion.

Smoothies are like moose shit, because if you re-arrange the letters in mooseshit, you get... smoothies.

Here is @alecgatorrr and I dressed up as
Ash and Pikachu, like a really long time ago. #transformationtuesday pic.twitter.com/kqac1dykO3