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yo homie I asked for a medium popcorn not a bunch of tiny popcorns
marry fuck kill? yeah i always choose fuck ha ha 😎
I am the Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2 now
Please RT I know it's not good
Idea: "Baby Idiots" - a riff/spoof on the "Baby Geniuses" series of films.
Possible dialogue: "Ok. This baby shit his pants?"
remember Batkid? Yeah, well. he fucked my wife
swipe left, swipe right, hey buddy, I'm just trying to WIPE MY ASS
"Mr. Carrey, we're out of coffee"
"ALRIGHT TEA THEN!"
who was the weather man today? Bono? I'm just kidding, it is a beautiful day though!
yo if you a pirate guess what you prolly got bird shit on dat shoulder homie 😂
when my dumbass kid won't shut up I just throw in an Ed Helms movie. That shuts his ass up, plus I get to watch Helms do his shit 😂
It's actually incorrect to say "Helen Keller" what you mean to say is "Anne Sullivan's monster."
You don't have to be a genius to see I'm in a Cheetos mood 😎
All I want for Christmas is for it to be here already!
Who was the weather man today? Harry Potter? Just kidding. It has been rather magical though 😊
yeah I like to branch out if you mean blast michelle branch all fucking goddamn day yeah fuck that's what I do
Legendary Humorist probably for the New York Times
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