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Might I actually get some sleep tonight?
Yeah..... Probably not
Just caught myself fapping to the beat of born this way
You can picture me naked now
Casey Anthony and George Zimmerman should hook up.
The awkward moment when someone tweets you during sex
Um.... Give me a sec baby
Took me ten minutes to write this
This is not good
Speaking of facials....
Fap time then nap time, don't hate
Is there a law about masturbating while driving?
Don't break ma heart ma achey breaky heart I jus don't think u'd understand
Getting piss in my bed drunk tonight
At a fancy dinner with my girl as she bends over to get stuff out if her purseI yell NO DON'T TOUCH ME THERE
She then punched me in the dick