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  • NickFlora
      Nick Flora @NickFlora

    'The Kardashians' have now been on the air twice as long as 'Arrested Development.' THIS IS WHY YOU CAN'T HAVE NICE THINGS, AMERICA.

    • 1,975
    • FAVS
    funnybeachgirlall_about_todayAceFlavoredstarwarsshirtits33me33bitoulasSmoothDadMeggieStrange
    • 15k
    • RETWEETS
    CaptYogaPantsall_about_todayAceFlavoredSmoothDadhbreaker9999purppeopleaterd_a_nichocourtneyno
    JosesLovesYoutrialfemme
  • NickFlora
      Nick Flora @NickFlora

    It's gonna be hard convincing our kids that stop lights weren't invented as social media check stations.

    • 523
    • FAVS
    AceFlavoredtonywoodliefkcMcCowgirlmegindapegleeleebrookehhbreaker9999ericsshadowatanenhaus
    • 404
    • RETWEETS
    AceFlavoredits33me33kcMcCowgirlhbreaker9999highflyingmommaCherBear162jensen1230rockermommy3
    VN_RubenWindPushedGrass_jennjennSDHeadTrip
  • NickFlora
      Nick Flora @NickFlora

    Still kinda freaks me out that someone born in 1996 is old enough to have a job and opinions and stuff.

    • 550
    • FAVS
    AceFlavoredstarwarsshirtleeleebrookehMeggieStrangehbreaker9999harrisonvcODeadInsideocourtneyno
    • 318
    • RETWEETS
    AceFlavoredhbreaker9999sandyjreeseharrisonvcCherBear162kmmoore12thedamonsmithnatasha_nel
  • NickFlora
      Nick Flora @NickFlora

    Just witnessed a 9 year old get a call on her iPhone, roll her eyes, hit ignore, then put it back in her pocket so I give up.

    • 556
    • FAVS
    AgataHoszJordan21487SuzetteLakeMiff6LorraineReddit_iPhoneSuheiryFelivanluvz1LoriLuvsShoes
    • 257
    • RETWEETS
    AgataHoszSoulinGrieveray_marshallsvanluvz1LoriLuvsShoesKiki_ShimmerziiLadyBirdkollarp
  • NickFlora
      Nick Flora @NickFlora

    The Great Gatsby was so unrealistic. So many people at those huge parties and not once did anyone ask for the wifi password.

    • 410
    • FAVS
    AgataHoszJordan21487LombaxWhispererD_LinleyMiff6Lorrainealiceonthefloorcandyhh15DetectiveOf221B
    • 285
    • RETWEETS
    AgataHoszSalehaMohideensjam29Calamity2467candyhh15vanluvz1LoriLuvsShoesAceFlavored
    brookeisgolden
  • NickFlora
      Nick Flora @NickFlora

    Twenty bucks says Bruce Willis is squinting at something right now.

    • 436
    • FAVS
    AgataHoszJordan21487SoulinGrieveSuzetteLakeTheMarkASimmonsvanluvz1LoriLuvsShoesuh_like_iDunno
    • 228
    • RETWEETS
    TheMarkASimmonsvanluvz1LoriLuvsShoesAceFlavoredstarwarsshirtCherBear162goldenblurbbeelzebud27
  • NickFlora
      Nick Flora @NickFlora

    Saw couple fighting, the woman said "I can't even look at you right now" then stared him down, proving his previous claim that she's a liar.

    • 378
    • FAVS
    AgataHoszLombaxWhispererMiff6Lorraineray_marshallsA_Bike_Guyvanluvz1LoriLuvsShoesAceFlavored
    • 210
    • RETWEETS
    AgataHoszSoulinGrieveA_Bike_Guyvanluvz1LoriLuvsShoesAceFlavoredfavstar_historyMissiextweets
    kferrandino
  • NickFlora
      Nick Flora @NickFlora

    It's sad that our children will never understand the relationship between a cassette tape and pencil.

    • 292
    • FAVS
    AceFlavoredstarwarsshirthbreaker9999ODeadInsideocourtneynoItsDawgTimeZPITINDNYRBOSstephaniehas
    • 174
    • RETWEETS
    ZPITINDNYRBOSstephaniehasJasonCarney31thunderw0rm______AdrianYoung10Violent2Dope304nicecrazylady63KimBru49
    KoJo_Sunshine____poe927
  • NickFlora
      Nick Flora @NickFlora

    Whenever I'm over-thinking a lyric I remember that Eminem said "mom's spaghetti" in a song and it won an Oscar.

    • 281
    • FAVS
    AceFlavoredstarwarsshirthbreaker9999erinshinaDharmaDao________wifewithabsODeadInsideocourtneyno
    • 146
    • RETWEETS
    AceFlavoredODeadInsidekittenishcutieInfoQuirksPapiZwaneevidentlyblondetylersorrellsGivVi_G
  • NickFlora
      Nick Flora @NickFlora

    Mall kiosk workers are the human equivalent of pop-up ads.

    • 234
    • FAVS
    uh_like_iDunnol3ah21Ohaiqtpiejen_trumpAceFlavoredlilmissbeachbumstarwarsshirtdie4destrage
    • 160
    • RETWEETS
    jessecarlson23AceFlavoredlilmissbeachbumstarwarsshirthbreaker9999highflyingmommaJKW6284hannonymousAZ
    Inkdhawaiian
  • NickFlora
      Nick Flora @NickFlora

    Bored? Do this:

    1. Click here  http://gizoogle.net 
    2. Type in  http://twitter.com/YOURTWITTERUSERNAME  & hit enter
    3. Read tweets
    4. Thank me.

    • 194
    • FAVS
    AceFlavoredhbreaker9999ODeadInsidebeelzebud27trolllynpoptartmcdicknsdmutatiJn1fer
    • 191
    • RETWEETS
    poptartmcdickns311_MamaSofa_King_BuenoaligoopsheepandrobotsTwitmytweetiesTroubledScribeChrisLeeJax
  • NickFlora
      Nick Flora @NickFlora

    When R. Kelly dies, I call dibs on the "R.I.Pee." joke.

    • 241
    • FAVS
    its33me33hbreaker9999lizelarsenAK_BMONEYODeadInsidebeelzebud27shannon2703Inkdhawaiian
    • 133
    • RETWEETS
    shakeethatashAK_BMONEYvictorialingeMaguireJeremytrolllynMikeRoch69InkdhawaiianJn1fer
  • NickFlora
      Nick Flora @NickFlora

    How many calories does avoiding eye contact with everyone in Target burn?

    • 249
    • FAVS
    starwarsshirthbreaker9999ODeadInsideMonaJean84eborg01SuvieDClseifxoericandreas80
    • 84
    • RETWEETS
    JesKeepSwimmingellenteeshashaintlZPITINDNYRBOSstephaniehaslegendbanterjewfacekillaJn1fer
  • NickFlora
      Nick Flora @NickFlora

    RT the sounding joy.

    • 124
    • FAVS
    hbreaker9999ODeadInsidebeelzebud27WindPushedGrassLorieGZpoptartmcdicknsJn1fereinsteinsexual
    • 199
    • RETWEETS
    Jn1fernewlywedboobsStephanieRoetsKamakazi_Mina_CherriAnn_Twitmytweetiesfavstar1000favsbrookeisgolden
  • NickFlora
      Nick Flora @NickFlora

    Taylor Swift is going to write a bitter song about Adele and Adele's going to write a song about how it made her sad and we'll all buy both.

    • 174
    • FAVS
    starwarsshirtdie4destrageCherishMeleeleebrookehhbreaker9999highflyingmommaODeadInsidebeelzebud27
    • 147
    • RETWEETS
    hbreaker9999AmedicusHowell_skysailingWindPushedGrassAdrianYoung10poptartmcdicknsDemtaidmutati
  • NickFlora
      Nick Flora @NickFlora

    If there's a farmer named Andre out there and he's NOT calling his stand at the farmer's market "Beets by Dre" then I give up.

    • 199
    • FAVS
    starwarsshirthbreaker9999Jane___JonesattheUCODeadInsidebeelzebud27JamieGreenleeswhickedchild
    • 119
    • RETWEETS
    attheUCbeelzebud27LaContentaVidaTerror_85mshannahjonesWindPushedGrassdmutatiJn1fer
  • NickFlora
      Nick Flora @NickFlora

    Nothing squashes your confidence like jeans right out of the dryer.

    • 204
    • FAVS
    starwarsshirthbreaker9999Kally_ParkerattheUCODeadInsideFancyNancyAnnMonaJean84aShiverOfSharks
    • 108
    • RETWEETS
    attheUCMonaJean84haleysfallingkazibelWindPushedGrassKate_Drenning_littlevoice14Ctchandler247
  • NickFlora
      Nick Flora @NickFlora

    The weather guy just said "rain-wrapped tornado" and I heard "bacon-wrapped burrito" so I'm gonna die hungry now.

    • 206
    • FAVS
    starwarsshirthbreaker9999Kally_ParkerXclairemckXattheUCLuvPugODeadInsidebeelzebud27
    • 86
    • RETWEETS
    attheUCfavstar_historybeelzebud27Jn1fer311_Mama_ArtIsINFINITE_trolllynBlotterMonkey
  • NickFlora
      Nick Flora @NickFlora

    Only Ellen could turn the Oscars into a youth group lock-in. #Oscars

    • 175
    • FAVS
    hbreaker9999attheUCODeadInsideraske_dancertaylorfielder_filmysticmemoshephiitskendra
    • 113
    • RETWEETS
    attheUCAbbsMeyers_32Gironsymeghan__wolfauthor_eeburkeusedtobenicholePeterMcIndoe1joneichler
  • NickFlora
      Nick Flora @NickFlora

    Every day that I don't use algebra as an adult, the homework protest speech I gave my mom when I was 15 is validated.

    • 199
    • FAVS
    starwarsshirtdie4destragegeekycookerCherishMeleeleebrookehhbreaker9999TheGloriousCuntXclairemckX
    • 68
    • RETWEETS
    notbrandonIrbyhbreaker9999XclairemckXattheUCfavstar_historyJaiyeJonesWindPushedGrassInkdhawaiian
    datafaucet
@NickFlora

@NickFlora

performing songwriter, host of @WhoWritesPod, pop culture enthusiast, self-appointed king of sarcastic charm. http://favstar.fm/users/NickFlora