Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
One of the best parts about being an adult is sending your landlord a superman/wonder woman/batman covered check
"I'm loopy because I'm tired and my vagina is shedding it's inside layer. It's all like 'we out'"
I'm about as gay as they come, and I'd still drop my pants for Adam Levine.
BILL NYE IS GONNA BE ON THE NEW SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS WHAT IS AIR
Are you guys happy that I'm tweeting regularly now or
Rape jokes really aren't funny at all.
I work my fuckin ass off six days a week so you bet your booty I'll spend my money how I want
The only penis I like is rubber and wraps around my waist with a strap
Girls should look up to women like Tina Fey instead of idiots like the Kardashians.
Guy in class said gay marriage is bad. Well, sir, so is polyester, tattoos, and sports using an animal carcass (football). See you in hell.
WARNING: if you see a link to a free clip of the new Nickelback album DO NOT CLICK IT. It contains a free clip of the new Nickelback album.
Sometimes I really hate my tits for hindering my ability to wear awesome guys' clothes.
I mean it's not like a banana or cucumber. It's water bottles and cellphones, guys. She'd probably eat a newborn if she really wanted to.