@delbius Never forget. pic.twitter.com/ri8v7xyuUT

Wish fail.  http://vine.co/v/bwdnbLAI3EL 

That awkward moment when you kick a pillow off the foot of your bed and it turns out to be a small child.

@danadanger 8-yr-old: Ohhh. So being a straight white male is like the easiest setting! 5-yr-old: But you're always gonna lose. We all die.

Happy Halloween! (cc @khay @evygee @delbius @jmhodges @robinsonangela) http://t.co/SjQMuWT1

Discussing parody over coffee with 8-year-old at a trademark conference. He came up with Starbutts. Accompanying logo idea pretty solid.

 http://i.imgur.com/vctMA.gif 

@jmhodges Gangster. http://t.co/llJXsiBG

Dying inside as I watch my son try to impress a trio of 4th grade girls w/ 512 squared. "They might want space." "I don't understand."

@truebe Welp. pic.twitter.com/jaSVs92L

Best thing about Skyfall: Q  http://makeagif.com/media/11-13-2012/4D3icj.gif … (cc @olix0r)

Fuck farmers market, I'm going bowling.

The trick is to pick people you would follow into the fire who would never lead you into it. (cc @delbius, @alissa)

Just want to settle down to a nice life with this maple cruller. A little house in the country, a farm, dancing in town on Saturday nights.

Left several people trapped in the game room because I misunderstood their pleas for help as a poorly timed invitation to play foosball. :(

"Mama, what's the difference between sexy and sexist?" And there went the evening.

I do a lot of wishing children on people.

Ha! I use Lockerz, bitches.

I trust the grumpy.

Current status: http://t.co/fhlgCWYZ