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I'm a babe in the woods
I don’t actually use your picture for your contact photo. I just use a different picture of me for every contact in my phone.
You don't really miss that person, you're just horny.
I hope you're being unfunny ironically.
You're never alone ( when you're drinking with the internet )
Who the fuck is butch T
Im all sweaty from running outside in circles with my soccer ball.
All I hear is crickets and doom
I told this girl that I killed it when it came my turn to freestyle, she said don't feel bad you aren't black. I don't think she understood
Being paid to exist sounds like a dope job.
If you're watching this tape I guess i'm dead
Glasses still broken, but my sideburns are gone.
Why am I compelled to stream myself playing a game while showing my face at 1080p? I don't have a good answer for that pregunta.
Shaving was like meeting my long lost brother. Who was handsome, and also me.
My test for finding psychopaths look for a member of the audience who doesn't look embarrassed uncomfortable at an improv show.
Accidentally kissed Burts like eight times
If we hadn't met but were Internet pals and I picked you up from the airport I wouldn't hold a sign with your name it'd be a picture of me.
What if a legitimate wedding ring turned you invisible to thirsty people?