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The annoying thing about watching shows on DVR is I can't live tweet them and annoy the shit out of all my followers.
I don't really care what happens with Zayn and One Direction, but if someone is going to quit their job I'd really rather it be Ted Cruz.
Me: Put a semi-colon there.
Coworker: What's that?
Me: Like a cross between a colon & a comma.
CW: Oh you mean winky eyes!
Me *kills self*
Someone is leaving One Direction? That's in-Zayn!
Based on his holiday, I can only assume that St. Patrick was the patron saint of liver damage.
Uh oh. It's Friday the 13th. Know what that means?
Nothing. It means absolutely nothing.
Tim Burton is directing Dumbo, which is exciting news for anyone who's ever wondered what Johnny Depp would look like in an elephant suit.
The good thing about having two Bachelorettes is there's double the chances one of the relationships will work out. So, like 10%.
Apprentice Jabbawockee & Beer Pong Enthusiast. Also, I once gave a girl a broken compass--Bachelorette Season 7
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