I'm more confused than a chameleon in a bag of skittles.

I have sexdaily.

I mean dyslexia.
Fcuk!!!!

There are so many scams on the Internet now...Send me $19.95 and I will tell you how to avoid them.

Everybody makes mistakes, but remember to be sure to point out your own before you point out someone else’s.

I just wanna snuggle up with you.

Why be difficult when with a bit of effort, you could be impossible??

People who describe things as better than sex are having the wrong kind of sex.

I come into the house soaking wet & I am greeted by "is it raining outside?" hummm, no, I decided to take my fish for a walk.

Life has no remotes.. You've gotta get up and change it yourself.

Loyal people go through the most bullshit.

The closest I've ever gotten to murder is holding an Oreos under the milk until the bubbles stop...

Courage is fear in action

The trouble with trouble is that it always starts out as fun.

"I don't have time" is the grown up version of "The dog ate my homework"

99.9% of all LOLs are typed with an expression like this 😳

We should all start to live before we get too old. Fear is stupid & so are regrets.

Dear God
So far today I've been good. I haven't gossiped, been selfish or nasty.
But Im getting up in a min & I think Im gonna need ur help.

I meant to behave but there were too many other options.

Stupid online buying.. I ordered 3 items from the same site & they are sending everything out at different times?! #dumb

I'm tired.
Can you just call yourself an idiot?