Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
Beware of wolves in sheep's clothing because they're so adorable and fluffy you'll never want to stop petting them.
We spell Hanukkah however we want in English because it's a Hebrew word but I like telling people it's because Jews control the media.
Sorry Santa but nobody in America uses the word naughty to mean bad.
Axe Body Spray sounds like it should be blood.
When I look at people I don't see color or gender. I really only notice humans at all if they're walking a cute dog.
Pay? No I don't get money for this but the replies telling me how badly I'm doing are rewarding enough to make everything worth it.
Sorry I'm late. I was thinking about how to cleverly string together words into a joke in 140 characters or less to post for free online.
My mother's Italian, my father's Jewish and I should be in therapy.