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Janeane Garofalo, Ted Alexandro, Jim Gaffigan , DC Benny and Judah Friedlander on one show...and still some lady wouldn't shut up.
I think a real sex tape of Cameron Diaz would fail at the box office also.
Dinner party is going great. I've shifted from anti social to 'guy that can't stop eating'.
I wish my girlfriend loved me as much as she loves gay guys.
Tinder but for burger joints.
If you're ever gonna buy yourself an ice cream sandwich, go ahead and buy yourself two.
Never politely ask a woman for directions at a bus stop. They always assume you're trying to rape them.
Prince George doesn't impress me. He's a baby. I'm not impressed by a Prince I can crush with my hands.
Comic appearing on @AXStv @iamroadcomic and weekly on @hammerfisting podcast
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