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"Suck my Glock" --Homo thug
Q: What do fat people smoke to get high?
A: A fast food joint.
There's more gang activity around Khloe Kardashian's pussy than there was at the corners of Florence and Normandie during the 1992 LA riots.
"Fuck you, I don't need to go on a diet.. you need to buy stronger furniture."
If your name is Taz.. I'm under the assumption that you're either a cartoon character or a cat.
<-------- Healthier than Derrick Rose.
Waiting for DIRECTV to bring back "statutory rape' Rob Lowe.
Dr: Have you been to West Africa in the past 21 days?
Me: I bought some bootleg DVDs and I did get cutoff by a cab, does that count?
Maybe I'm paranoid but whenever I'm done shopping at Target, I feel like there's a bull's-eye on my bag.
The number one cause of accidental deaths among interpreters for the deaf.. Is drive-by shootings.
Fat, bald and I have a small dick. Emmy winning comedy writer @caspermartinez still lets me write with him. I RT A LOT! http://t.co/pXORQzpr8O