RT if you want to see her topless! pic.twitter.com/XkKjPmQ4Ds

This pic of Amanda Bynes is actually so beautiful. pic.twitter.com/8reYstxowH

I wish I was 1/1,000,000th as persistent about anything as LinkedIn is about reminding me of invitations.

The no make-up look ☺ #BabyFace Good morning!  http://instagram.com/p/Zk9swULJ9Q/ 

Yay I have Money! Wait, nope I've already spent it.

Me every payday.

How to get a deal #SharkTank - great article - highlights 5 case studies ( 2 of them are my investments ) -  http://www.shopify.com/blog/7789467-how-to-get-a-deal-on-abcs-shark-tank#axzz2SdVmQmEM …

white girls be like omg I'm so fat pic.twitter.com/gOpxPUlmcU

You can learn a lot when your internet connection is down. For example, I learned I have three kids.

Our solar system to scale. pic.twitter.com/rknhYZKHA0

Lying on the floor, breathing. Pretty sure I've got this yoga thing down.

Who wore it better??? pic.twitter.com/Fyz5sbexMA

If the meteor crashed in America, everyone would be suing space.

Last night I watched a movie in it's entirety and I only checked twitter like 5(0) or 6(0) times.

QUIT CLAPPING. He has said NOTHING that is worth clapping about! #SOTU

One of the guys that dated #TaylorSwift should write a song called, "Maybe You're The Problem." #TheGrammys

They have named this new Nor'easter Nemo. I am not looking for it.

"And that, kids, is How I Met Your Mother. Kids? Kids?!" pic.twitter.com/OeKg4w0B

Why do I keep giving Merlots a chance? -.- I'm 100% a Cabernet sauvignon person.

I've been on a diet for 20 minutes. I don't see any results yet and want to kill everyone.

If the fate of the world ever depended on me opening a new plastic grocery or produce bag in under a minute, we'd all be dead.