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  • PaxOfficio
      PaxOfficio @PaxOfficio

    I like my book club, mostly because I'm the founder and only member. Still the endless arguing gets annoying.

    • 49
    • FAVS
    PrezofEarthSean_DoughertyjennjoysmithUPTIGHTishDDDBUomarsawolfjamesleostevenslinajk
  • PaxOfficio
      PaxOfficio @PaxOfficio

    My GF has started calling her period "Shark Week." Perfect way to warn me of the blood and danger in terms I understand.

    • 43
    • FAVS
    BombayHeychdaimonic0PrezofEarthSean_DoughertyUPTIGHTishomarsawolfjamesleostevenslinajk
  • PaxOfficio
      PaxOfficio @PaxOfficio

    I've had a ziplock full of pistachios all day, and not once called it my nut sack. I'm all grown up now, aren't I?

    • 36
    • FAVS
    daimonic0PrezofEarthSean_DoughertyUPTIGHTishdarthelwigsheilamwojomarsawolfAdamJBonerman
  • PaxOfficio
      PaxOfficio @PaxOfficio

    Working in a cubicle is like being a kid, playing in a cardboard box...and being unable to imagine the box is anything but a box. Yay! Box.

    • 34
    • FAVS
    jennjoysmithUPTIGHTishomarsawolfFussySaffaMyDogDieselCroweJamDadsUpLate.kambrock
  • PaxOfficio
      PaxOfficio @PaxOfficio

    This weekend we gain an hour. Depending on how much I drink tonight, I could break even!

    • 24
    • FAVS
    UPTIGHTishjenfunkyjenDadsUpLate.kambrockEsseErre_bluedream420razorwittedchiclet_
  • PaxOfficio
      PaxOfficio @PaxOfficio

    My inner 12 year old just realized you could put people on a twitter list named "to-do"

    • 23
    • FAVS
    Donnamite1UPTIGHTishomarsawolfAdamJBonermanjamesleostevensC0CK5TARkambrockJeanM617
  • PaxOfficio
      PaxOfficio @PaxOfficio

    Revisiting personal life mission statement: Idea 1: Invent absurd field of study, then become tenured professor of it.

    • 22
    • FAVS
    UPTIGHTishkambrockbluedream420razorwittedchiclet_BlondHousewifenorthpacificabrevi8
  • PaxOfficio
      PaxOfficio @PaxOfficio

    Back at work, still sick. Dizzy, maybe about to hallucinate. I sure hope I'm still contagious! Wheee!!!

    • 22
    • FAVS
    UPTIGHTishDadsUpLate.kambrockEsseErre_bluedream420chiclet_BlondHousewifenorthpacific
  • PaxOfficio
      PaxOfficio @PaxOfficio

    Just got my performance review. Much lower marks this year, same period I started tweeting. Coincidence? Totally.

    • 21
    • FAVS
    jennjoysmithUPTIGHTishkambrockEsseErre_bluedream420chiclet_BlondHousewifenorthpacific
  • PaxOfficio
      PaxOfficio @PaxOfficio

    Someone needs to tell Starbucks that their Via suppositories are too jagged on the ends.

    • 20
    • FAVS
    jtaliaUPTIGHTishC0CK5TARkambrockJeanM617bluedream420razorwittedBlondHousewife
  • PaxOfficio
      PaxOfficio @PaxOfficio

    Merged my book club with my social anxiety support group. What a nightmare! I'm still the only member of both, but I just can't get along.

    • 20
    • FAVS
    jennjoysmithUPTIGHTishkambrockbluedream420chiclet_BlondHousewifenorthpacificrbok
  • PaxOfficio
      PaxOfficio @PaxOfficio

    I'm not ignoring you, I'm just micro-listening to you so I can multi-listen to other sources. Please continue.

    • 19
    • FAVS
    UPTIGHTishkambrockbluedream420chiclet_BlondHousewifenorthpacificreverendrossLaceyMark
  • PaxOfficio
      PaxOfficio @PaxOfficio

    Dressed up today for a VIP visit. I'm essentially a giant magnet that attracts coffee and mustard.

    • 18
    • FAVS
    jtaliajamesleostevenskambrockreverendrossJeanM617chiclet_bluedream420SweetKeriLynne
  • PaxOfficio
      PaxOfficio @PaxOfficio

    I'm not refusing to work, I'm micro-participating.

    • 18
    • FAVS
    kambrockbluedream420chiclet_BlondHousewifenorthpacificreverendrossLaceyMarkrbok
  • PaxOfficio
      PaxOfficio @PaxOfficio

    I hope no one ever asks me for words of wisdom about middle age. All that comes to mind for me is "Oops."

    • 18
    • FAVS
    kambrockbluedream420chiclet_BlondHousewifenorthpacificLaceyMarkrbokgroverviolet
  • PaxOfficio
      PaxOfficio @PaxOfficio

    I like turtles. Sorry, that's all I got for ya this morning.

    • 18
    • FAVS
    HappyHappyMarcybluedream420chiclet_BlondHousewifenorthpacificrbokgrovervioletnavanax
  • PaxOfficio
      PaxOfficio @PaxOfficio

    Does everyone have demon faces instead of human faces today or am I the only one seeing this?

    • 16
    • FAVS
    Deeta89C0CK5TARkambrockbluedream420BlondHousewifeJeanM617redtothetonenorthpacific
  • PaxOfficio
      PaxOfficio @PaxOfficio

    Dear coworkers: I can get some jollies with Twitter or I can just tell you what I really think of you. Your choice.

    • 16
    • FAVS
    kambrockbluedream420BlondHousewifenorthpacificreverendrossLaceyMarkrbokMrBigFists
  • PaxOfficio
      PaxOfficio @PaxOfficio

    You look like you need a hug. I'm not giving you one because human emotion is not welcome here at work, but anyway: mental hug.

    • 16
    • FAVS
    kambrockbluedream420razorwittedBlondHousewifenorthpacificLaceyMarkrbokgroverviolet
  • PaxOfficio
      PaxOfficio @PaxOfficio

    Quick reminder: Yetis are fucking awesome. That is all, Over and Out.

    • 15
    • FAVS
    JeanM617bluedream420BlondHousewifenorthpacificreverendrossrbokgrovervioletmelmaren
@PaxOfficio

@PaxOfficio

Higher primate in office cubicle habitat. Don't tap on the glass, please.