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A view ☯ from Mars @PetMyWeasel
I'll see your boobies and raise you a boner.
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A view ☯ from Mars @PetMyWeasel
Jeffery Dahmer never would have been caught, if he knew how to make jerky.
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A view ☯ from Mars @PetMyWeasel
Whats the difference between spit and swallow ? 30lbs of pressure on the back of her head.
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A view ☯ from Mars @PetMyWeasel
what does..ROUGH SEX,SMALL FARM ANIMALS and ALCOHOL have in common ? I cant remember..but i'm having some really bizarre flashbacks.
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A view ☯ from Mars @PetMyWeasel
I wish there was LSD flavored popcorn !
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A view ☯ from Mars @PetMyWeasel
I put the 'lure' in Failure !
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A view ☯ from Mars @PetMyWeasel
THINGS that go bump in the night...don't worry it's just me drunk and in the wrong house....AGAIN
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A view ☯ from Mars @PetMyWeasel
How do boneless chicken survive to become adults ?
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A view ☯ from Mars @PetMyWeasel
"GO FUCK YOURSELF !" I'll watch.
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A view ☯ from Mars @PetMyWeasel
I'm beginning to understand what a serial killer thinks like.
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A view ☯ from Mars @PetMyWeasel
Ed Gein was a fashion designer way ahead of his time.
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A view ☯ from Mars @PetMyWeasel
sedated the cat, made some plaster of paris, waited 30 mins and now kitty w/airhole is awoken as a garden gnome, maybe a youtube moment here
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A view ☯ from Mars @PetMyWeasel
This tweet was brought to you by Smirnoff Vodka & Tyson chicken nuggets
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A view ☯ from Mars @PetMyWeasel
tick tick tick MURDER tick tick tick MURDER tick tick tick MURDER tick tick tick MURDER tick tick tick MURDER - Update from Detroit
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A view ☯ from Mars @PetMyWeasel
Never trust a newborn baby to do chores around the house.
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A view ☯ from Mars @PetMyWeasel
BREAKING NEWS: Santa failed his drug test.
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A view ☯ from Mars @PetMyWeasel
Never ! trust a squirrel who wears a hoody !
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A view ☯ from Mars @PetMyWeasel
I wish I owned a Pharmacy !!!
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A view ☯ from Mars @PetMyWeasel
I just saw you naked...(gathering my composure) ..suddenly i find myself in the fetal position crying for mama.
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A view ☯ from Mars @PetMyWeasel
DAMMIT ! Just did a face plant in the cat box ! After only 3 martini's. Gonna be a great night !!!!!!!!!!!! : )
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A view ☯ from Mars’ Best Tweets

@PetMyWeasel

getting lovey dovey with my semi-automatic trippin' on acid & TV static civilization turned creature feature the Jung at heart are going back to Nietzsche

4

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